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Song Parodies -> "Send In Dem Clowns"

Original Song Title:

"Send In The Clowns"

Original Performer:

Frank Sinatra, Judy Collins

Parody Song Title:

"Send In Dem Clowns"

Parody Written by:

Jeff Stambo

The Lyrics

Don't bother, they're here. Just turn on CNN.
Is it a witch
Plus an odd pair
Leading the contest to be
John Kerry's heir
Send in Dem clowns

Isn't it odd
Isn't it droll
How they can't make up their minds
Without a poll
Where are those clowns?
Send in Dem clowns.

Just when it seems
Hillary's through
Suddenly she’s got a dopey new health plan for you
Watching her working the room you may think as you glance
Why isn't Bill wearing those pants?

If you love farce
Lend them an ear
Hear how they lie through their teeth
Yet seem sincere
And Where are the clowns
Quick Send in Dem clowns
Don’t bother, they’re here

John Edwards says
Our nation's split
That's a legitimate point of view we must admit
Now that we’ve seen how palatial his residence is
One country’s ours
One country’s his

Aren’t you impressed
Don’t you revere
How slickly Obama inflates
His non-career
He’s one of the clowns
There’s plenty more clowns
Just wait ‘til next year

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 24

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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Michael Pacholek - June 04, 2007 - Report this comment
Let me get this straight: We have to endure 600 more days of Bush fascism and incompetence, and the Republicans running to replace him are all pledging fealty to his war (except for Ron Paul, who's nuts for completely different reasons)... and you're calling the Democratic candidates clowns?
Immoral Liberal - June 04, 2007 - Report this comment
Frankly, a clown probably could have done a better job these past two terms - I don't think Bozo would have started an unjust war. Hey Jeff, it's the war, stupid.
Jeff Stambo - June 04, 2007 - Report this comment
The abuse of the word "fascism"---making it a receptacle for whatever imagined offenses that you've had to endure,---is right up there with the free use of "nazi" to describe just about anyone with whom the writer disagrees. Both abuses neutralize the moral content of the word in question, and tend, over time, to desensitize us to the real horrors that have been perpetrated by fascists and nazis. Unlike a teenager whose verbal tics cause him to say "whatever" or "y'know" as a subsitute for actually saying anything, people with Nazi/Fascist Tourrette's do real damage. If you really think you're living under fascism and you have the chance to get out---which you do, of course, just as Solzhenitsyn did not---- there's something seriously wrong with you if you stick around. By the way, claiming that you're staying because you want to change things for the better is not convincing, honest, or intelligent. If it's really fascism we've got here, you won't be doing any changing from the inside, short of an armed insurrection. And I seriously doubt that anyone who spends time writing 16-stanza parodies about basement NFL parties is also drilling with the People's Militia. Or maybe the parody thing is your cover.
McKludge - June 04, 2007 - Report this comment
Bozo would have just dropped water balloons from the stealth bombers. They certainly could use the water in Afghanistan.

I hate that people attack Edwards and Gore for being millionaires yet still caring about the less fortunate. You'd rather they be millionaires and say "screw the poor" like a good many Republicans?
Robert J. Pagliaro - June 04, 2007 - Report this comment
Jeff, allow me to make it very simple. I live in NYC, we were attacked on 9/11 and have continued to be walking targets since then - the latest "pipleline" plot runs two blocks away from my house. Why is it that me and 90-plus percent of the other New Yorkers believe that we would have been safer and we will be safer if a democrat is in the White House? All I ever wanted after 9/11 was Osama Bin Laden - you gave me Saddam Hussein. It doesn't seem like a fair deal to me. Send in the clowns, please.
Immoral Liberal - June 04, 2007 - Report this comment
Would you prefer to have you and your party called neo-fascists or neo-nazis? If you honestly believe that this administration has not committed real horrors then perhaps you're already desensitized. The Patriot Acts are unConstitutional and the war in Iraq is unjust. Again, I ask the question, ou est Osama?
jeff stambo - June 04, 2007 - Report this comment
"Would you prefer to have you and your party called neo-fascists or neo-nazis?" I rest my case. I would no sooner argue with you guys than with the homeless guy across the street who thinks he's Captain Ahab. Absolutely pointless. Robert Heinlein said it best: Never try to teach a pig to sing; it wastes your time and it annoys the pig.
Immoral Liberal - June 04, 2007 - Report this comment
If it looks like a fascist and acts like a fascist, it's probably a fascist. Perhaps if you people were a little less rah rah on the war, we could help the homeless guy across the street - but he thinks he's Capt. Kirk, not Capt. Ahab. Jeff, things will get much better - the dummy in the White House has less than 600 days left. It will take a hell of a lot to undue the mess you people have left us but I'm sure that the democrats can get this country back on the right track again - just like Bill Clinton did. I can't wait - I bet you can't either. (Did you object to us being called "commies" for so many years?) May your municipality allow gay marriage and outlaw guns. Immoral Liberal
Freewheelin' Bob - June 04, 2007 - Report this comment
Jeff: Dylan wrote a line in Desolation Row...."And someone says you're in the wrong place my friend, you'd better leave"...which is more apropos today than in 1965, if we are talking about the futility of arguing politics on this website, where Pacholek will automatically 1 you if you diss the Yankees or democrats. Not that you care, just be aware there is no middle ground here, and mine fields every where you look
Immoral Liberal - June 04, 2007 - Report this comment
I will ask the question again - and the "fascists" will again avoid it - Ou est Osama?
Osama is underground - June 04, 2007 - Report this comment
After Clinton let me bomb with impunity for years, including:

1993 Feb. 26, New York City: bomb exploded in basement garage of World Trade Center, killing 6 and injuring at least 1,040 others. In 1995, militant Islamist Sheik Omar Abdel Rahman and 9 others were convicted of conspiracy charges, and in 1998, Ramzi Yousef, believed to have been the mastermind, was convicted of the bombing. Al-Qaeda involvement is suspected.

1995 April 19, Oklahoma City: car bomb exploded outside federal office building, collapsing wall and floors. 168 people were killed, including 19 children and 1 person who died in rescue effort. Over 220 buildings sustained damage. Timothy McVeigh and Terry Nichols later convicted in the antigovernment plot to avenge the Branch Davidian standoff in Waco, Tex., exactly 2 years earlier. (See Miscellaneous Disasters.)

Nov. 13, Riyadh, Saudi Arabia: car bomb exploded at U.S. military headquarters, killing 5 U.S. military servicemen.

1996 June 25, Dhahran, Saudi Arabia: truck bomb exploded outside Khobar Towers military complex, killing 19 American servicemen and injuring hundreds of others. 13 Saudis and a Lebanese, all alleged members of Islamic militant group Hezbollah, were indicted on charges relating to the attack in June 2001.

1998 Aug. 7, Nairobi, Kenya, and Dar es Salaam, Tanzania: truck bombs exploded almost simultaneously near 2 U.S. embassies, killing 224 (213 in Kenya and 11 in Tanzania) and injuring about 4,500. 4 men connected with al-Qaeda 2 of whom had received training at al-Qaeda camps inside Afghanistan, were convicted of the killings in May 2001 and later sentenced to life in prison. A federal grand jury had indicted 22 men in connection with the attacks, including Saudi dissident Osama bin Laden, who remained at large.

2000 Oct. 12, Aden, Yemen: U.S. Navy destroyer USS Cole heavily damaged when a small boat loaded with explosives blew up alongside it. 17 sailors killed. Linked to Osama bin Laden, or members of al-Qaeda terrorist network.

8 Years in the White House getting B.J.s, Clinton couldn't be bothered with these atrocities, all leading to 9/11

At least Bush is HUNTING for him.
Immoral Liberal - June 04, 2007 - Report this comment
Right, 9/11 was Clinton's fault. And Watergate was just a burglary. You fascists just don't get it. It happened on your watch and you chose to get Hussein - wrong answer.
Jimmy Carter fan...NOT - June 04, 2007 - Report this comment
I.L, why don't you stick your head in the ground like an ostrich. Yep, We got Hussein, and he needed getting. You let Osama run free out in the open with Clinton. Bush is trying to find him, (which Clinton couldn't be bothered with), while a BILLION Radical Islamists are trying to hide him. Tough job, but at least we are SEARCHING FOR HIM. Osama was in public when Clinton was in congress, lying about B.J.s.

And let's not forget your precious Jimmy Carter, putting the Ayatollahs in power in Iran. GREAT JOB JIMMY!!!!
Average American - June 04, 2007 - Report this comment
To the "Right": We won't get fooled again.
John Jenkins - June 05, 2007 - Report this comment
Excellent parody, Jeff. The Edwards verse was my fave. Thank you for trying to explain the error of the "fascism" comment. I have tried to make that point before, but it seems that some people don't pay attention.
Red Ant - June 05, 2007 - Report this comment
Jeff, to be honest I thought your parody was a 534 (sorry, I'm a bit biased toward political parodies in general), but your first comment earned you the triple nickel.

IL, you're half right: gay marriage is a good thing, but outlawing guns is one of the many areas the Democratic party fails on a spectacular level. Not that I like the Republican party by ANY means, but you guys need to hear some other reasons why Al Gore lost in 2000.

Jeff: I've a better quote than your Robert Heinlein quote: "Arguing with strangers over the Internet is like entering the Special Olympics: even if you win, you're still retarded" - author unknown. Keep up the good work.
Michael Pacholek - June 05, 2007 - Report this comment
This is why I like Malcolm Higgins, and occasionally John Jenkins, and miss Guy DiRito: They can do right-of-center parodies with wit and imagination, and sometimes they're even funny. Funny trumps a lot. But when you start saying it's the Democrats' fault that 9/11 happened, when the 9/11 Commission pointed out everything the Bushies did wrong, then you throw your own credibility out the window. "Fascism" is defined by most dictionaries as a totalitarian philosophy symbolized by nationalism, militarism, bigotry and close, often secret connections between the government and big business. That is what the Bushies have given us. Bush is NOT hunting for bin Laden. As early as May 2002, he was saying, "Honestly, I don't think about him much anymore." Clinton came within 2 hours of killing him in August 1998, but you didn't care because you were obsessed with his sex life. Bush had him surrounded in December 2001, but let him go, and moved the troops to feed his insane vendetta against Saddam. To paraphrase John Spencer from "The West Wing": To deserve to sweep all 50 States, Bush would have needed to do two thing: Blow bin Laden's brains out in Times Square, and then walk across the street to McDonald's and buy a Big Mac. He does not deserve the Presidency. He deserves to have the cell next to Paris Hilton's. Her crimes are nuisances, his are of the most damnable variety.
jeff stambo - June 05, 2007 - Report this comment
"But when you start saying it's the Democrats' fault that 9/11 happened, when the 9/11 Commission pointed out everything the Bushies did wrong, then you throw your own credibility out the window." MP---Can't find where I said that stuff in this song; enlighten me. You seem to have wandered over to the wrong parody. Or maybe it's Tourrette's. Best of luck.
Max Power - June 20, 2007 - Report this comment
Great work.
Real American Patriot - June 20, 2007 - Report this comment
It's the war, stupid. Yet another attempt at trying to get our minds off of the war and the tens of thousands of innocent people who have died or been maimed. Sorry, but again, fascists just aren't funny

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