I started my career saying Obama didn’t have a real certificate.
Besides he’s black so that means he could never really be a legal president.
Putin helped me win after I made all of those other guys look small and dumb.
So now I please my base and say those nasty things about - immigrant scum.
I see all of the fake news every day there in the papers and then on T.V.
And it is only “Fair and Balanced” when I’m on my favorite show - Fox Friends and Me.
Some say I have to worry about Congress and investigations that they’ll do
But I’ll just keep on nominating folks who say they’ve spoken to that Surgi dude.
I contact my supporters every four AM I think that I am so obtuse.
Maybe I’ll improve my ratings if I give an interview and tell the truth
Musical Break
(spoken) They say I haven’t accomplished anything while President…I got health care repealed and replaced…no I couldn’t get any support; I got my travel ban… no the courts shot that down; Speaking of courts, I got that guy I hardly knew into the Supreme Court…That’s good…Right?

I’m the President, we have the House; we have the Senate; tell you what we’ll do
Pass a health bill that will kill 24 million of you; give or take a few;
Cheap rates to choose; Access for you; Pre-existing too; Tax breaks? Well, that’s for a few