This burger's way too greasy.
It's gonna make me queasy.
Put it back on the grill.
Turn up the propane power.
Cook it for half an hour,
Or it will make me ill.
Don't want to eat pink ground beef! That's meat abuse.
And don't give me - one full of that red juice.
'Though I'm a happy fella,
I don't want salmonella.
You're spoiling all my fun.
For I won't eat a burger - 'til it's well done.

Call me a party pooper. I think I'm wise,
'Cause with food health - I will not compromise.
I know it's marinated
But please serve it cremated.
Remember! Hold the cheese!
'Though my tastebuds you're whetting,
It's still not done I'm betting.
I'll take no chance of getting - gastric disease.

(Spoken) Just leave it on a little longer.

(Sung) So keep on with your grilling.
It's my gut that you're filling.
It's nasty germs you're killing. Sterilize these!