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Song Parodies -> "The Ballad of Jed Can't-Clamp-It (Heavily Spillbillies)"

Original Song Title:

"The Ballad of Jed Clampett (Beverly Hillbillies)"

Original Performer:

Flatt & Scruggs

Parody Song Title:

"The Ballad of Jed Can't-Clamp-It (Heavily Spillbillies)"

Parody Written by:

Brian Herrin

The Lyrics

Inspired by the media blitz surrounding the Deepwater Horizon spill (and some great classic Bluegrass)
Come and listen to a story that will set you seeing red
Big Oil and the government were sleepin' in a bed
And then be-cause M.M.S. was in their camp,
Liz B. approved Deepwater with a worn-out rubber stamp
(Formality that is... Bush Era deregulation)

Well the first thing you know they were drillin' out at sea
Transocean owned the oil rig and leased it to BP
Then one day when the chief was overruled
And up through the well come a gush of light crude
(Oil that is, black gold, Palin Punch)

Well the next thing you know there was fire everywhere
But no one ever thought that the riser pipe would tear
And even if it did, there was still the B.O.P.
But the thing didn't shut, so it belches Texas Tea

When the story hit the news, lots of folks got really mad
So BP told the media "look folks, it ain't so bad...
We'll clean up all the oil and we promise that we'll pay
'Cuz we calculate the flow at just a couple thou' a day"
(Barrels that is...sweet, light crude)

Well Obama's uninvolvement soon was found to be in vain
Republican's compared it to George Bush's hurricane
Said that the Gulf is the place you oughta be
So they loaded Air Force One and he went to scold BP
(Gulf that is, skimming pools, oozy tars)

Well the next thing you know they were runnin' out of booms
Some scientists discovered there were underwater plumes
Obama told the company the costs you must defray
'Cuz your estimates are off by up to 20 thou a day!
(Barrels that is... 102 gymnasiums worth!)

Well the next thing you know the investigation came
The players pointed fingers as they tried to shift the blame
When asked in front of Congress who to blame among the three
Haliburton said Transocean and Transocean said BP

Well now it's time to say goodbye to this huge gooey mess
And here's to old Bill Maher who I think expressed it best
For every asshole who was chanting 'Drill Baby Drill"
Put on your freakin' overalls and help clean up the spill!

Heavily Spillbillies, that's what they call 'em now,
Nice folks. Y'all come back now, ya hear?)

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   1
 4   0
 5   8

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

AFW - June 11, 2010 - Report this comment
Great subs...fabulously funny spoof...gushes with funny lines...A* all the way
McKludge - June 11, 2010 - Report this comment
"Palin Punch" Nice.
Bruce da Moose - June 11, 2010 - Report this comment
Nice work, Pal! Hits every nail on the head!
NorCALgal - June 11, 2010 - Report this comment
I echo Lord McLewd above, as well as the TexasTea line, Sir ! This is fun, despite the subject ! I can actually hear a certain ~cBro~ Cowboy singing this one in his scratchy 'Scotch & Soda' voice . . .
Earl Scumms & Festered Splat - June 11, 2010 - Report this comment
Those of us who live in the five gulf coast states do not find much humor in your parody even though you are mostly correct with the facts of the matter. The parody could have been a lot better if not for a copious amount of pacing problems and what scanned like forced flow-put in the rhythm timing. Gotta ding you for that with the voting. One plus is that you played no favorites. This, like Fox News declares itself, it is "fair and balanced". Sorry to get down on you about humor but I can't bear the thought of so much pristine coast line about to get entirely pigged up, not to mention losing two of my favorite foods - Oysters on the half shell and boiled shrimp.
LateNight - June 11, 2010 - Report this comment
Wow Earl,you must REALLY hate Letterman!
Earl and company - June 12, 2010 - Report this comment
Why would I hate Letterman? He had nothing to do with the disaster. Pointing blame does nothing for the problem. We have needed action since day one and what has the current administration done about it? Obama could have at least waived the Jones Act of 1920 so we could get some international aid. What? Ten minutes tops to whip out an executive order? It is painfully obvious who hates what. It is Obama who hates the south. And no I did not vote for Obama - so I can hammer his administration without being hypocritical.
Merchant Marine - June 12, 2010 - Report this comment
Information on the "Jones Act of 1920" can be found here:

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