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Song Parodies -> "I Shower Never"
Original Song Title:
"It's Now or Never"
(MP3)Original Performer:
Elvis Presley
Parody Song Title:
"I Shower Never"
Parody Written by:
MasonR
The Lyrics
Why does this person never shower? See Alvin Rhodes' "Shower Viewed Through Peephole" parody yesterday! (Actually, I started writing this several weeks ago...)
I shower never
I'm getting ripe
My body's odor
Could flames ignite
You smell me in fifty states
I shower never
My stink is great
When you are near me
How your eyes do water
Your nose does fear me
Your senses slaughtered
I'd send a lifeline
But I smell like old brine
Don't get too near
Because I fear you'll faint
I shower never
Malod'rous blight
Don't breathe nasally
You'll die tonight
I work out and perspirate
And chew on garlic
You can't escape
My stench makes landfill
Seem like spring and roses
Breathe deep for a thrill
My skin decomposes
But soap offends me
And bathwater scares me
Befouling scent
You'll need a vent, my dear.
I shower never
Fetid am I
It's so bad that I
Can't attract flies
You smell me in fifty states
I shower never
I marinate!
I'm getting ripe
My body's odor
Could flames ignite
You smell me in fifty states
I shower never
My stink is great
When you are near me
How your eyes do water
Your nose does fear me
Your senses slaughtered
I'd send a lifeline
But I smell like old brine
Don't get too near
Because I fear you'll faint
I shower never
Malod'rous blight
Don't breathe nasally
You'll die tonight
I work out and perspirate
And chew on garlic
You can't escape
My stench makes landfill
Seem like spring and roses
Breathe deep for a thrill
My skin decomposes
But soap offends me
And bathwater scares me
Befouling scent
You'll need a vent, my dear.
I shower never
Fetid am I
It's so bad that I
Can't attract flies
You smell me in fifty states
I shower never
I marinate!
Parody Copyright Mason "Toxic Avenger" Resnick
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
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| 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 7 | 7 | 7 |
User Comments
Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.
So, what you're saying is that nearness to you is not Nirvana, that your smell's obscene, fear it? :-)
Stan - This really, really stinks. Actually there is a lot of cleverness written into this. The best I've seen and glad I can't smell from you yet. Varying your choruses is a BIG plus here. Well done. Now here is $5.55. Take it and buy some soap and cologne you smelly slob. =;-)
Restoring odor to the universe, are you?
that was just lovely....lol....stinky ol' 5s for you
555 for "you smell me in 50 states"
Thanks Stan, Guy, Michael (feel the force!), alvin, and littleCupCakes (I'm kinda pleased with the "50 states" line myself...)!
Mason, I've only seen clean parodies from you before! I also had a good laugh at the 50 states.
Dude - to quote Johnny D - "this was very good". I had to read it after seeing the comments of Guy, Pacholek and Cupcake. Did you know that Guy voted for Hillary?
The best of today... 5-5-5
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