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Song Parodies -> "Hello, I'm 30"

Original Song Title:

"Hello, I Love You"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Hello, I'm 30"

Parody Written by:

Ann Hammond

The Lyrics

Hello, I'm 30, but at seven I stay
Hello, I'm 30, that's my brain tumors way
Hello, I'm 30, but at seven I stay
Hello, I'm 30, that's my brain tumors way

Get deafened ain't that neat?
Implant picks up every beat
But' I'm sad do you know why?
My brain cant process most talk sigh

Hello, I'm 30, hardly adult just play
Hello, I'm 30, wake up what do today?
Hello, I'm 30, hardly adult just play
Hello, I'm 30, wake up what do today?

Cant understand this my
Often depressed living why?
I'm not quick witted, and I am not strong
Just do what I can that's right not wrong

Sidewalk looking down at feet
Then at plant try and see something sweet
Sometimes I do see something real cool
And I tear with joy, a precious jewel

Buck doe, Buck doe, Buck doe, Buck doe, Buck doe, Buck doe, Buck doe, Buck doe,
Buck doe,
They'll have a baby
Buck doe, Buck doe, Buck doe, Buck doe
Feel free to ask me if you have any questions. Brain tumors are fun and so is going deaf. I love plants and butterflies as well as many other insects.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 12

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   11

User Comments

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Patrick - July 29, 2013 - Report this comment
Is this autobiographical?
Al Silver - July 29, 2013 - Report this comment
All 5's, though it's certainly not funny. Hang in there, Ann. You have many friends.
Ann H - July 29, 2013 - Report this comment
Yes, I am 30 right now and I did have the brain tumor at 7. I went deaf in the left ear in 2003 and didn't get the Implant until 2010. There seems to be lots of things I just don't understand and it's not uncommon for me to get some real bad depression sometimes.
Ann H - July 29, 2013 - Report this comment
glad I have friends
Patrick - July 29, 2013 - Report this comment
I've heard that the implants are enabling a lot of people to regain hearing or to hear for the first time. Were you able to hear until 2003? If so, you are getting back something you lost. I wonder what it would be like to hear for the first time as an adult. Listening to music is an important part of my life, and one of the few pleasures that is neither controversial or harmful physically. Depression is tough to deal with, but I know it can be overcome. Hope you find what works for you.
Jonathan - July 29, 2013 - Report this comment
you have many friends here that love you Annie you'll be okay!
Callmelennie - July 30, 2013 - Report this comment
Not only that, but many of your friends, judging by their song selections, are old enough to be your daddy. I have a daughter in her twenties and several nieces in your age range. And the last thing I'd ever want is to see my babies sad and blue.
Lifeliver - July 31, 2013 - Report this comment
As you can see, you're welcome here, Ann. Something to think about: when you say 'he he' do you mean 'heh heh' (quiet chuckle) or 'hee hee' (witch's cackle')?
Ann Hammond - July 31, 2013 - Report this comment
my he he is more of a heh heh. I'm not a witch, but evil laughs I do do. Hearing with the brain seems a lot different then hearing with an ear. I first taught myself to hear music by singing to myself. At first my brain just made everything sound like garbage cans. I have a parody on this in my stuff somewhere.
Ann H - August 01, 2013 - Report this comment
here's my CI parody
Annie - September 25, 2015 - Report this comment
:( *hugs Ann*. I also have a brain tumour and depression (I had brain surgery 2 years ago when I was 27 to remove 2 other brain tumours, and the part of the brain that controls moods was removed, so I suffer from depression and severe mood swings). I understand what depression is like and I'm sorry you have to go through it :(. I'm sorry that you're deaf on top of that :(. If you ever need a friend to talk to or vent to, you can add me on Facebook (Annie Chen. I'm white and married to a Taiwanese husband). I'd be more than happy to talk to you or have you as a friend.
Ann H - September 26, 2015 - Report this comment
Thank God that when I had my surgery my tumor was totally removed. I had a ( lets see if I spell this right) medolablastoma. When I was 17 I had a voice in my head ask me if I'd rather be blind or deaf. I said " thats a tough choice God" and after some more talking, I chose deaf over blind. When I was 21, I became deaf.
Annie - September 27, 2015 - Report this comment
Wow :O What a difficult battle you're going through :( I'm so sorry. How are you doing now, post-surgery?
Ann H - September 27, 2015 - Report this comment
gone through, the problem now is am I ever going to get a job? Is there any volunteer work I can do without my head blanking out on me? I've been reminded that the only thing I seem to recall well and fast is music. I can parody well, but don't think I'll be becoming a profecional parodist. That might be the only thing I can try to do with myself though.
Ann H - September 28, 2015 - Report this comment
You know what? I wasn't me who first worried about getting a job, it was my mom. If I might have to kill myself to get ready for some sort of job ( and then end up forgetting something else because that's how my head works) then I don't think it's a great idea.
Annie - September 29, 2015 - Report this comment
I understand. I'm also going through that should I work or volunteer issue myself as I'm not 100% stable with my head/brain. I don't want to suddenly go into a seizure and be a liability to people. So I dunno. I think you should go with your heart and do what you feel is best, not what others think :)
Ann H - September 29, 2015 - Report this comment
exactly, go with my heart. I don't think there is anything I love more or can do nearly as well as writing parodies here. If mom does insist I have to get help from some disabiitly service ( she doesn't think writing parodies is doing anything with my live, but I do) If she takes me to some disability service thing I'm going to tell them that I write parodies. If my mom doesn't want me to tell them that then f her
Ann H - September 29, 2015 - Report this comment
Somewhere I said I learned how to control my anger. In most cases I can, but not with my mom. I think what I need to say is that I put the anger where it can be.
Ann H - September 29, 2015 - Report this comment
I told my mom today that I was talking with someone who had a tumor and they're afraid they might have a seizure while trying to work. My mom said that if you go through a disability program, someone will be with you in case you do have a seizure while trying to work. I don't know if you can get in one Annie, but that's what my mom is trying to do with me.

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