Now I’m the king of the WASPies
Oh, the Gentile VIP
I’ve reached the top and had to stop
And that’s what’s bothering me
I wanna be a Jew, Rabbi
And stroll right into shul
And take my words from Yiddish
I’m tired of being a shegetz fool

Oh ooby do, I wanna be a Jew
I wanna walk like Jews, talk like Jews do
You see it’s true, a goy like me
Can learn to be Hebrew too

(spoken part)

Now here’s your task for today, Rabbi. Lay the secret on me. Of circumcision!

(Rabbi says): But I don’t think you’d handle circumcision!

(sung)

Now don’t try to kid me, Rabbi
I’ll make a deal with you
I’d work and toil
To get that mohel
To make of me a Jew

So give me the secrets, Rabbi
C’mon, clue me what to do
So peel my meat, no pork I’ll eat
‘Cause I will be a Jew

(Insert a Yiddish-sounding scat improvisation here)

Yeah you, I wanna be a Jew
I wanna walk like Jews, talk like Jews do
You see it’s true, someone like me
Can learn to be like someone like you!