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Song Parodies -> "Madonna And Child (, the African one)"

Original Song Title:

"Love Child"

Original Performer:

Diana Ross And The Supremes

Parody Song Title:

"Madonna And Child (, the African one)"

Parody Written by:

Stuart McArthur

The Lyrics

Madonna is still on track to adopt little David Banda from Malawi, despite his Dad having second thoughts. She organises this meeting with him and makes her case....... (Listen to the OS here))
African dad...

You think that I don't FEEL love
well papa, don't preach to me, love
David's life needs SOME correcting...hug him
reject him

your child!
never meant to be
your child!
...born in Malawi!
your child!
take a look at me
your child!
I'm his new mummy!

in an old, cold, run down, African hut
no internet, no plasma screen, no funky mum
I'll find him kids with whom to play
Angelina, Calista
have some the same


this life I offer to him
is worth the pain of losing
your son who'd end up hating
the fam'ly you've been creating

your child!
never meant to be
your child!
in your...society
your child!
I'll give him the chance
your child!
...t'learn to disco dance



He'll go to school
in a lim-o-sine Elton John once used
...and all he has to do is give up everything
just give up all those simple things
like Africa, and next of kin. It's that easy!

don't think that I don't worry
(not much though - I'm in a hurry)
I'll pay witchdoctors to heal the...
enormous pain you'll be feeling

YOUR child's MY! (it's for the good)
was yours! now mine! Yes? Understood?

And I'll...always love Dave
I'll...always love...Da-a-ave
I'll always love Dave
I'll...always love...Da-a-ave
I'll always love Dave
I'll...always love...Da-a-ave
I'll always love

(psst Guy, d'you think we could sex that name up a bit....)

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 23

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   22

User Comments

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Kristof Robertson - October 25, 2006 - Report this comment
Holy hell, you're quick off the mark, McArthur! I was planning to do a Madonna/Dave parody for the Decathlon comp; I'll have to have a rethink! This was great- funny in places, kinda poignant in others. Terrific work. 555
Stuart McArthur - October 25, 2006 - Report this comment
I'M quick off the mark??? - this is the quickest comment I've ever received - I didn't even expect Newest Parodies to be updated yet, let alone a comment as well - and poignant??? (d'oh! I knew I should have done another rewrite!) - j/k - thanks mate :-)....and that smiley's all the smilier knowing I've foiled your dastardly plans - bwahahahah!!!
Jack Wilson - October 25, 2006 - Report this comment
This is awesome! 555!
Matthias - October 25, 2006 - Report this comment
Haven't heard this news story, doesn't mean it couldn't have happened........ I mean Mel Gibson on a drunken Nazi rampage happened this year, why couldn't have Modanna given birth to a black kid? As another Aftrican American Male once said: "I Pity The Foo Who Don't Take These Fives!"
Matthias - October 25, 2006 - Report this comment
My bad, adopt a black kid....... Oops, well there was the incident with Suri, so it could happen, heh...
alvin rhodes - October 25, 2006 - Report this comment of poverty versus a life with madonna..tough choice
TJC - October 25, 2006 - Report this comment
You make fantastic parodying seem like child's play! Great stuff!
John Barry - October 25, 2006 - Report this comment
First the Kabala debasement, now this. This shameless washed-up "talent" will apparently stop at nothing to perpetuate her celebrity status for as long as possible. Great skewering of a more-than-worthy target.
2Eagle - October 25, 2006 - Report this comment
Suri, Nouvell - any more? I wonder if that kid named Banda is any relation to that &$$#@!! Hastings Kumuzu Banda? Anyway, a fitting use of that stupid song.
Adagio - October 25, 2006 - Report this comment
Yes...great skewering. Also, "I'll give him the chance your child! ...t'learn to disco dance". She's going to ruin him for life!! 5's And I also stand aghast at the ease in which these parodies flow from your brain.
Dee Range - October 25, 2006 - Report this comment
What's the old saying? can take the child out of the jungle, but you can't take the brilliance outta Stu's brain...or something similar. From the 'Papa don't preach' beginning, through 'giving up the simple things like Africa and next of kin' (brilliant), and the inspired play on the OS with 'Your child's My child now', this was just typically Stu-pendous. Let's just hope she doesn't hire Michael 'The Molester' Jackson to sing at his birthday parties. Truly magnifico my friend.
Stuart McArthur - October 25, 2006 - Report this comment
thanks Jack

thanks Matthias - at least with Suri the mum's real(...ish)

thanks alvin - the jury's still out on that one

thanks TJ!

seems that way JAB, thanks mate :-)

thanks 2Eagle (off I go to Google...)

thanks Pat!

wow, thanks for such a generous comment Dee - (blushes - I'm sure that's not REALLY a saying...;-)) and lol re the M.Jackson comment - is 2006 the year for "celebrity/children" stories or what?
Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd - October 26, 2006 - Report this comment
I pondered a short parody about celebrity adoptions just yesterday but the lack of rhymes for the word adoption held me back, the following twoliner to Beach Boys "Good Vibrations" made it very tempting though:

They're making some good adoptions
They're giving them NASDAG options

Anyway, I got stuck (in more ways than one as you'll see later today) and decided not to nurture the idea further. You did very good with it though. :-)
Red Ant - October 26, 2006 - Report this comment
No LW this time, I got the your link the first read! I've only heard a bit about this myself, and don't follow much of Madonna's personal life, but this was a fun sing-a-long (no, I don't sound anything like Diana Ross). I too liked the Papa Don't Preach line, but the best was the view you took. 5s.
Stuart McArthur - October 27, 2006 - Report this comment
thanks Peter - intrigued as to what getting "stuck" did mean!

thanks Jack - she somehow manages to always be in the headlines
tomario - November 07, 2006 - Report this comment
she always seems to find away to grab the headlines. and you should be adopting a few points in the dec comp with this submission. 555
bobpiecheese - November 12, 2006 - Report this comment
(Decathlon - Event 7) Many thanks to thee, Stu, for providing yon mp3, for I am merely a young boy, who has NO FARKIN' CLUE who Diana Ross + the Supremes are...sorry, broke character there for a sec. Praise and 5's to thee!
Stuart McArthur - November 13, 2006 - Report this comment
thanks tomario and thanks bobpie - it's a great old OS, and was my phone's ringtone for about 2 years!
Kristof Robertson - November 20, 2006 - Report this comment
Haven't been so quick this time, Stu...this is still a classy piece (unlike Madonna)...;-)
Johnny D - November 20, 2006 - Report this comment
(Dec) Whoah ... I can actually hear Diana Ross singing this!
Josh 2 - November 20, 2006 - Report this comment
DKTOS but man was that funny 5s
Jeff Reuben - November 20, 2006 - Report this comment
A supreme effort! Nice turnaround time on current events!
Arwen - November 21, 2006 - Report this comment
Decathlon...I know you were quick out of the gates on this one, Stu...excellent job for such a fast turnaround.
Agrimorfee - February 11, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC) Very well done...but the topicality has faded.
Matthias - February 15, 2008 - Report this comment
In The News: 2006... Only really works for 2006, like Agrimorfee has said, but still it's very well done and I think it did well in the original Decathlon... Don't recall who won (I think Arwen) but anyways good write, but a bit dated.
Red Ant - February 15, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC4-M) The newest I've heard about Madonna is her plastic surgery... I don't think you intended to raise any serious questions about adoptions of this nature, but it would make for some interesting discussion. Well written as always, but this one didn't blow me out of the water like so many of your other parodies have.
bobpiecheese - February 17, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC4) Whoah, this was from the first Decathlon? That was a long time ago...long enough for me to forget the OS again. Still, it was apparantly awesome back again, thus it must be awesome still - it IS written by Stu, of course. More 5's to you!
Guy - February 19, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC-M) Amazing. It is funny and sad at the same time. You relly poured your soul into this one. I really, relly like this. Glad you put it up for comps or I'd have probably missed it. Excellent!
Below Average Dave - February 20, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC) I can't believe I haven't commented/read this one before, I could have sworn I've had. . .Well since I didn't comment apparently the first time I read it, my comment know isn't quite the same because the topic is a time issue, it had more meaning when it was written than it does now. . .still funny though.
Jeff Reuben - February 20, 2008 - Report this comment
Thought that sounded familiar, I did read and comment before. Nice to see it again!
Invisible Boy - February 20, 2008 - Report this comment
Super idea Stuart. Or as Gordy might say...Berry Berry good.( I believe he actually wrote this song) Topical or not, this was still excellent Maybe we are due for a sequel about how this kids doing now.
Mikey Squirrel - February 20, 2008 - Report this comment
ABC- I remember when this happened. You nailed this one right on the head, Stu. Great job.

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