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Song Parodies -> "The Supreme Court"

Original Song Title:

"Maria"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Cast of The Sound Of Music

Parody Song Title:

"The Supreme Court"

Parody Written by:

Steve Kalafut

The Lyrics

Back to lampooning The Sound Of Music. I couldn't help but notice that "Scalia" rhymes with "Maria". Then I decided to be fair and pick on all nine of them.
She climbs a tree and scrapes her knee; a lawsuit is her scheme.
Or maybe spills McDonald's coffee; it's as hot as steam.
And her appeal is taken by the justices supreme.
I think it's called a writ of certiori.

She's been denied admission to the college of her choice.
And even if they'll hear her case, it's no cause to rejoice.
I hate to have to say it, but I have to use my voice.
The court can sometimes refuse certiori.

I'd like to say a word in their behalf.
Then say it, counselor.
There's good jobs on their staff.

How do you solve a problem like Scalia?
How do you pin Justice Stevens down?
How does Renquist differ from Scalia?
And how many folks think Thomas is a clown?
In many a case O'Connor is the swing vote.
What kind of things does Breyer understand?
Will Souter and Ginsburg stay and listen to what you say?
Will Kennedy let you stay upon the stand?
How do you solve a problem like Scalia?
How do you hold the nation in your hand?

When they're talking I'm confused, out of focus and bemused,
And I never know exactly what to say.
Unpredictable as weather, asking questions as they gather
Information to decide it either way.

They can give you quite a test; so you'd better do your best,
As you wonder which amendment to invoke.
Their opinions will be read even after you are dead,
As the nine of them consider what you spoke.

How do you solve a problem like Scalia?
How do you pin Justice Stevens down?
How does Renquist differ from Scalia?
And how many folks think Thomas is a clown?
In many a case O'Connor is the swing vote.
What kind of things does Breyer understand?
Will Souter and Ginsburg stay and listen to what you say?
Will Kennedy let you stay upon the stand?
How do you solve a problem like Scalia?
How do you hold the nation in your hand?

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 3.7
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   1
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 5   2
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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

John Jenkins - December 10, 2003 - Report this comment
Very good parody, Steve. I find you guilty of excessive irreverence and sentence you to 5-5-5.

The Capitol Steps did a parody about Scalia to this song a few years ago, but yours is much different - definitely not plagiarism.

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