We smoke skunk from Amsterdam
We smoke m-d-m-a weed
We smoke different kinds of homegrown that we pick right off the trees
We smoke pollen, kif and temple balls that we bought off some bloke
What don't we smoke?
We don't smoke coke!

We get packages of crystal
We get doobies
We get blow
We get speeches from old Nancy and we're told to Just Say No
We get letters doused with hash oil
We get dizzy from the smell
What ain't we got?
You know darn well!

We've got nothing to clean our snow-white toot flute for
What we need is what dentists ain't got no substitute for

There is nothing like some coke
Nothing in the world
There is nothing you can smoke that is anything like some coke

We feel restless
We burn leaf
We feel horny, that's the beef
We feel every kind of feeling but the feeling of relief
We feel randy as the wolf felt when he schtupped Red Riding Hood
What don't we feel?
We don't feel good

Lots of drugs in life are beautiful but, brother
There is one particular thing that is in no way, shape, or form like any other

There is nothing like some coke
Nothing in the world
There is nothing you can smoke that is anything like some coke

Nothing hooks like some coke
And spoils your looks like some coke
There are no drinks like some Coke
And Brat and Minx® like some coke
And nothing blows like some coke
Or hurts your nose like some coke
There ain't a thing that's wrong with any man here
That can't be cured by whisky and beer
And freeze-dried ammonia-based grade-A Bolivian flake COKE!!!!