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Song Parodies -> "The Telemarketers Song"

Original Song Title:

"Rainy Day Women #12 & #35"

Original Performer:

Bob Dylan

Parody Song Title:

"The Telemarketers Song"

Parody Written by:

Stan Hall

The Lyrics

"The Telemarketers Song"

Well, they’ll phone you for some cause they say is good
They’ll phone you saying “Please donate .. you should.”
They’ll phone you when you’re tryin’ to get stoned
They’ll phone you up before your mind is blown
But just hang on and let’em drone --
Not ev’rybody must get phoned.

Well, they’ll phone you with a deal that sounds so sweet
What they’re phonin’ with is likelier deceit
They’ll phone you up and say “But wait, there’s more!”
They’ll phone and offer extra stuff galore.
Just say “Not now,”always postpone --
Not ev’rybody must get phoned.

They’ll phone you when you’re watchin’ porn on cable
And , own up ... don’t you hope some phone-sex babe’ll
Chance to phone you while you’re watchin’ people f*ck.
Tho’ it’s known she’ll charge a minute for a buck..
But I would not really bitch and moan …
Not ev’rybody thus gets phoned.

They’ll phone and say they have free gifts to send
That’s baloney, all they have is junk to vend.
They’ll stonewall your “No thanks,” hang on and spar
They’re known to disregard “Au revoir”
If they won’t ring off, hang up your own --
Not ev’rybody must get phoned.

They’ll phone you up and bore you to the bone …
They’ll phone you from Encino to Bayonne …
They’ll phone you if you previously gave. …
They’ll phone you, but if your time you would save
You’ll give’em when they do the old dial tone --
Not ev’rybody must get phoned.

© Stan Hall As "Hair"'s "Sheila sang, "... easy to say no." :-)

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   8

User Comments

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John Barry - February 18, 2008 - Report this comment
Nice parasite-bashing.
Agrimorfee - February 18, 2008 - Report this comment
Phunny foneiness!
alvin - February 18, 2008 - Report this comment
great concept and execution....the unrelenting repitiousness of the original lines fit the theme well
2Eagle - February 18, 2008 - Report this comment
Tell them you are on the "Do not call" list. Now on to spam.......
AFW - February 18, 2008 - Report this comment
Good write about one of my least favorite, "Tele's"
Michael Pacholek - February 18, 2008 - Report this comment
I worked as a telemarketer for an hour and 45 minutes. Then I remembered that I understood the concept of shame. Dial 555-THIS-ROX.
Stan - February 18, 2008 - Report this comment
Thanks, all. MP -- my daughter lasted about as long as you did when she tried telemarketing as a part-time gig for beer money during her college days. :-)
littleCupCakes - February 19, 2008 - Report this comment
Sir Stan, I let "Stan Getz"' take all my calls, while the ~Girl From Ipanema~ plays on my answer phone, this usually does the trick!!

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