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Song Parodies -> "Mothergoosian Slapstick Blues"

Original Song Title:

"Subterranean Homesick Blues"

Original Performer:

Bob Dylan

Parody Song Title:

"Mothergoosian Slapstick Blues"

Parody Written by:

Alvin Rhodes

The Lyrics

jack went up the beanstalk...messin' with a giant man
dude hit the, he is a dyin' man
a girl in a red coat...and hood...set off
granny had a bad cough...waylaid by a big wolf
books for kids ?...they're something best hid
oddly grim...and they're truly full of sin
a cat and owl on a holiday ?...seems they're more than just friends
a rap about some red-skinned chaps, numbered ten
went to heaven unfulfilled...its lonely again

rabbit comes fleet-foot...raced like a flash would
tortoise sensed defeat, but...down, was the hare, shut
gal eatin' curds and whey...spider comes to wreck her day
chased muffet right away....horror as the beast preyed
books for kids ?...these authors must be sick
boy grew a long nose....dude lies, schnozz grows
cricket keeps him on his toes....scared poor gepetto
took some hard blows...caused his dad, woes
they all came back together, man and lo, that's how the tale goes

poor jack...poor jill...headin' up a big hill
jack fell...jill, as well...and everything just hurt like hell
no lard...its barred...jack sprat...thin trail
too frail...on scale...wife is larger than her male
books for kids ?...should never been writ
there's losers, cheaters....stepmoms, often beaters
lamb had her lass fooled....followed her to her school
don't lunch with peter...he's a pumpkin eater

kids born...shoe chance
doggie's stressed....unblessed...nothing there to digest
hansel...gretel....get stiffed....unreal...woods, left
plenty ripe for cookin', but the witch instead was way miffed
books for kids ? keep on the lid
cause a wolf could get mangled...if, with pigs, he tangles
plums by the handfuls...horner had 'em ample
ate him a big clump...jack made a big jump
that chump may burn if he cannot clear the candle

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 16

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   16

User Comments

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Michael Pacholek - July 17, 2007 - Report this comment
You got a lot of nerve to say you are my friend. You submit this parody, it's somethin'. You got a lot of nerve with all the electrons you expend. This one just might be Song of the Monthin'! A spectacular piece, and I never would've thought of it!
AFW - July 17, 2007 - Report this comment
Seems like you and Agrimorfee have meshed, today....Another fine job on a tough Dylan song..that you've blended into a great telegrammy-like story of all fairy tales, and/or nursery rhymes...Max fives
John Barry - July 17, 2007 - Report this comment
A Mother masterpiece!
alvin - July 17, 2007 - Report this comment
thanks michael AFW and john....glad ya enjoyed
Ravyn Rant - July 17, 2007 - Report this comment
I'm so glad I stopped by today! Another bit-o-genius from Alvin. 555
alvin - July 17, 2007 - Report this comment
thanks ravyn :)
Matthias - July 17, 2007 - Report this comment
Great Goose!
stuart mcarthur - July 17, 2007 - Report this comment
the idea alone was brilliant al, but way to nail the execution mate! - fave line: "boy grew a long nose....dude lies, schnozz grows" ha! - 555
John Jenkins - July 17, 2007 - Report this comment
This parody earns 5s just for the "oddly grim" line. And the rest of the parody maintained that standard.
alvin - July 17, 2007 - Report this comment
thanks matthias stuart and john for your kind comments
Red Ant - July 17, 2007 - Report this comment
Superb writing and very funny. Glad to see you tackled this OS. 555
alvin - July 18, 2007 - Report this comment
thanks red ant
Leo Keough - August 16, 2011 - Report this comment
Stumbled upon this one today about four years too late...Absolutely hilarious!!!...555!!!
Dee Range - September 23, 2018 - Report this comment
Just stumbled upon this one. One of your best, Alvin. Hard song, brilliant execution. When I Paint My Masterpiece...I hope it's half as good!
paul robinson - September 24, 2018 - Report this comment
Fantastic work matching Dylan's cadence to a "T". Dee - thanks for bringing this one back into public view.

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