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Song Parodies -> "Medication Now"

Original Song Title:

"Desolation Row"

Original Performer:

Bob Dylan

Parody Song Title:

"Medication Now"

Parody Written by:

Phil Alexander

The Lyrics

Doesn't the state of affairs all round the world get you down at times? A glimpse into the mire of mindlessness all around us... Depressed? You will be once you've read...

They've giv'n a knighthood to that author
The "Satanic Verses" bloke
Seem like the whole of Islam's up in arms
They want their Salman smoked
There's a Pakistani minister
He's ranting, so irate
Ain't suicide bombing for literature
Rather disproportionate?
And the rioting is pointless
From Islamabad to Slough
I'll turn my TV off and take
My medication now

Channel four has got this freak show
Filled with brainless fame-struck liars
Hoping controversial racism will
Send the ratings higher
And if I were there, I'd be moaning
"You're all stupid, I Believe"
Big Brother says, "You're in the wrong place, my friend
You better leave"
As contestants there redefine
The meaning of "low-brow"
I'll leave reality and take
My medication now

There's guys who want Creation
To be taught in science class
Call it "Intelligent Design"
Intelligent, my arse
No proof of Cain and Abel
Their whole pretext is a swizz
All they've proved is they've no clue
Of just what "science" is
And they're so blinkered and stupid
And I really can't see how
So instead I'll say "who cares?" and take
My medication now

Now Tony Blair, he's out of office
But there's still war in Iraq
Does he wish that he could turn back time
And take that decision back
Because death is not romantic
And too many had to die
For a great lack of intelligence
Invasion for a lie
But Tony is still there on telly
As he takes his final bow
His face grins on as I reach for
My medication now

Pal'stine's attacking Israel
Israel won't call a halt
Like two infants caught fighting
Both will swear "it's all HIS fault"
Their diplomatic spokesmen
Each attempt to pass the buck
One means to kill civilians
The other says it's just bad luck
Firing rockets indiscriminately
That helps exactly how?
Makes my head hurt so now I need
My medication now

"Dr." McKeith, she has been told
A "Doctor", she is not
No, she cannot have "patients"
And my patience with her is shot
For she's always on the telly
Telling folks what not to eat
But buy freak foods on her website
I guess life for her is sweet
But she knows nothing 'bout science
And is such an arrogant cow
I'd never let her recommend
My medication now

On the TV's an Apprentice
He's an X-Pop-Den-Brother hit
Until the public vote him off
After that, no one gives a shit
There's ritual humiliation
There's a confessional chair
Where he rambles 'bout his petty dreams
Leaving his ah.. soul bare
As one by one they're voted out
And leave with grimaced "Ciao!"
So false I'm needing something real
My medication now

Well, so much for democracy
Look at what it's become:
Government of the stupid
By the bozos, for the dumb
The choice at general elections
Of whom we can elect
Is between prats and a***holes
No wonder it's all wrecked
The ship of state's a ship of fools
Some plonker at the prow
Well, ain't it so depressing, give me
Medication now

A million soap operas
A billion tuning in
A new opiate of the masses
It's a new relig-ee-yin
A pointless, brainless waste of time
It's televisual spam
Because nothing ever happens, at least
Nothing worth a damn
Just a hint of sex or violence
Where the censors will allow
As millions of brain-dead viewers take
Their medication now

Yes, I believe what Einstein reckoned
That the stupidity of man
Like the Universe is infinite
Hell, I don't understand
For though mankind rules the planet
And in contests has prevailed
In the greater cosmic IQ test
It's clear that he has failed
As I ride into the sunset
On a purple-spotted sow
And the nurse comes in and says just take
Your medication now

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 14

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   14

User Comments

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Homer Simpson (channeled by Michael Pacholek) - July 12, 2007 - Report this comment
Mmmmmmmm.... Vicodin!
Red Ant - July 12, 2007 - Report this comment
Sweet rant with some great wordplay: "Salman smoked" and "Leaving his ah.. soul bare" stood out. You might be the first author to tackle this OS that had to leave out material...
Jack Wilson - July 12, 2007 - Report this comment
That was awesome
alvin - July 12, 2007 - Report this comment
a masterpiece...5s plus
Phil Alexander - July 12, 2007 - Report this comment
Thank you :-)
Red Ant - I did shelve the Paris Hilton verse, but I'm sure that there were other targets who escaped. But then, I had plenty of material for my previous rendition of this song (come to think of it, with a whole new slough of parody authors, I could probably do another "Plagiarism Ho", just as original as the first one).
McKludge - July 12, 2007 - Report this comment
Things ain't no better in the states, either. I wish I hadn't read this while at work, because I really need a stiff drink now. Top notch ranting. 555
2Eagle - July 12, 2007 - Report this comment
They want their Salman smoked and on a skewer. You touched all the bases very well - except for sports.
Phil Alexander - July 12, 2007 - Report this comment
Sports? D'Oh! Completely forgot about the sporting arena of stupidity..
McK - I started off needing a stiff drink, but I find writing this sort of stuff is pretty cathartic
AFW - July 12, 2007 - Report this comment
Excellent philosophy in satire...some great lines, like, "Salman Smoked" and "Ship of state... ship of fools"
Cat - July 12, 2007 - Report this comment
What does it say about me that this actually made me feel BETTER about my day? Excellent, Phil.
Phil Alexander - July 13, 2007 - Report this comment
Cat - possibly that you revel in the stupidity of others? Or more likely that it makes you feel you're not alone in seeing idiocy in almost every dircetion :-)
AFW - Thank you - I suppose it is kind of philosophical. Bit of a pessimistic philosophy, though.
Matthias - August 11, 2007 - Report this comment
Depressingly funny? (An oxymoron if I've ever heard one)
Red Ant - August 17, 2007 - Report this comment
SOTM) To quote Einstein: 'Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.' Einstein was modest, to say the least....

See above, and, again, take 5s and call me in the mourning....
Agrimorfee - August 20, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Whew, what a rant! Here's 555mgs of benzedrine, mate.
Max Power - August 21, 2007 - Report this comment
Dose of 555
Peter Andersson - August 22, 2007 - Report this comment
SOTM - You summoned up the state of things in a committable way here.
minh - August 25, 2007 - Report this comment
Kristof Robertson - August 28, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) How'd I miss this gem? Brilliant, brilliant, brilliant....Victor Meldrewesque in tone, and all the funnier for it. I'd rave more, but it might upset you. ;-) 555++
bobpiecheese - August 29, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Oh dear. What a mess our world is today. Gimme the pills once you're done with 'em, okay mate? Oh, and brilliant work!
stuart mcarthur - August 30, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) you lampoon religion better than anyone, Phil, and I'm behind you all the way - intelligent, lots of clever wordplay, and a dry weary sarcastic tone throughout - brilliant - and I liked "Leaving his ah.. soul bare" and the purple spotted sow - 555
wannabemustangjockey - August 30, 2007 - Report this comment
SOTM - sounds like you had some fun with this one.
Jack Wilson - August 31, 2007 - Report this comment
See above!
Below Average Dave - August 31, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) I'm going to cry. . .I seriously am--listening to this dang song again, twice in one contest, and that's four seven minute plus songs. . .oy vei. . . That aside, I think that you were very sneaky in this one, you have a tendency to turn things that on there own aren't terribly funny, but the way you do it is. . .

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