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Song Parodies -> "Ballad of the Clone Brigade"

Original Song Title:

"Ballad of the Green Berets"

Original Performer:

Barry Sadler

Parody Song Title:

"Ballad of the Clone Brigade"

Parody Written by:

Patrick McWilliams

The Lyrics

Julia Ward Howe jumped out of bed and wrote "The Battle Hymn of the Republic". I couldn't sleep last night, so I wrote this. I'm surprised I haven't used this classic song before. When the story came, it came fast.
Test tube soldiers in a lab
My creations on a slab
Every one is custom made
Fill the ranks of the Clone Brigade!

Choose some genes, discard the rest
Build some men, eugenicist's best
One hundred more just made the grade
Joined the ranks of the Clone Brigade

They don't fear and they don't hate
More of them I'll propagate
Find a country to invade
My brave men of the Clone Brigade

Groomed to fight on sea or land
Hit and run, or hand to hand
Skilled with gun and hand grenade
Victory to the Clone Brigade

There are soldiers at the gate
My infantry might seal my fate
Through my blood they aim to wade
Turncoats of the Clone Brigade

Put primal cells into a dish
Rule the world, that was my wish
They're SNAFU'ed, the plans I made
I must flee the Clone Brigade
SNAFU, old military acronym Situation Normal All F*cked Up.

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   4

User Comments

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Old Man Ribber - July 22, 2011 - Report this comment
Patrick - When the muse speaks, it's time to write. As for clones, I'm not a fan. They lack originality. Once you've seen one clone, you've seen them all! ;D
Peter Andersson - July 22, 2011 - Report this comment
Why do people always assume that cloning will be done for military use? I predict that when it becomes a reality we will have shops on every corner selling clones that look like young Jessica Alba, young Catherine Zeta-Jones, young Pamela Anderson etc - and for a totally different purpose. ;-)
Rob Arndt - July 22, 2011 - Report this comment
Peter, you have a great idea... might even work against pedophiles and priests!!! Young schoolgirl, young altar boy, etc...!!! But then again you'd have newly enacted Clone Rights!!! As for the military, no clones but Supersoldier tech. Germany has fielded the only successful test suit- the IDZ Phase I tested in the Balkans. EADS is helping with Phase II now. Ultimately, these soldiers will reach Phase III- the fully-integrated, stealthy, aerospace soldier with incredible tech: Rheinmetall plasma rifle, light-splitting active aural camouflage, communication with all integrated German weapon systems, sight-recorder systems for real-time threat assessment and management, optiplate imaging and targeting, hexacore cellular steel armor, KKV launchers, sniper scanned echolocation, self-repairing systems, and computerized integrated monitoring of soldier performance (will they be on MINDEX drugs???)...
Patrick - July 22, 2011 - Report this comment
Peter, you may be on to something. If you've been following my cloning series, you've seen that these military adventures are not turning out so well. OMR what's even worse, those clones look like me. Rob, maybe I ought to try robots, instead.
Rob Arndt - July 22, 2011 - Report this comment
Patrick, Germans have tested them too with autonomous AFVs like the Wiesel and have designs for walking combat robots- ACRs (Autonomous Combat Robots). German SEKs and MEKs both use robotic bomb detonators and armed robots in limited roles already.
I Am Human And I Need 2 B Loved, Just Like Everybody Else Does - July 22, 2011 - Report this comment
Have you ev3er heard "(We're All) Clones" by Alice Cooper or seen the movie "Pink Floyd: The Wall"? Those works of art have strong anti-conformity themes, and they reflect the way I feel at times. OMR, I agree that clones have no originality. Have you also noticed how so many bands from the mid 90s to today are clones, and so many TV shows and movies are cookie-cutter? Your rewrite isn't like that, it's great and I salute you!
CloneTrooper - July 23, 2011 - Report this comment
Awesome!Excellent for Star Wars Clone Troopers.It's Totally necesary to make a youtube music video .Hurry up!
AFW - July 23, 2011 - Report this comment
How about a super hero, "Cy Clone" who worships the wind?
Patrick - July 23, 2011 - Report this comment
CloneTrooper, in case you are new to this site, I have granted permission to anyone with the requisite skills to record or produce videos of any of my parodies. All I ask is a copy and a reasonable share of any royalties (ha! ha!). If you have the time and the camera, go for it.

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