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Song Parodies -> "R-E-S-T-I-V-E"

Original Song Title:

"R-E-S-P-E-C-T"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Aretha Franklin

Parody Song Title:

"R-E-S-T-I-V-E"

Parody Written by:

Nib Oswald

The Lyrics

Inspired by an ex-classmate leaving school to have a baby, this depicts the
mayhem to come when one's offspring throw a tantrum. (also known as 'tanty')
(Boo)
Slop on walls.
(Hoo)
Staining my carpet.
(Boo)
Gosh, he peed.
(Hoo)
Didn't use the toilet.
(Boo)
Bawling tantrum.
(Hoo)
This horrid kid is restive, terror just keeps goin'.
(Flustered little kid)
He's raging.
(Such a delinquent)
We don't condone.
(Busted brittle bits)
Pesters!
(Master Hissy Fit)

I faint when-I see my young child's door torn.
Faint when-I see fresh dung
(Poo!)
On my new doona.
(Boo)
Bawling tantrum.
(Hoo)
This horrid kid is restive, terror just keeps goin'.
(Flustered little kid)
Crazy.
(Such a delinquent)
We don't condone.
(Busted brittle bits)
WAAAAAH!
(Master Hissy Fit)

Cries about no gifts and crawls to his mummy.
Then bawls a-spitting infinite dummies.
On his high horse- come off it!
Terror keeps goin'.
(Pester, pester, pester, pester)
He's raging.
(Cross now, cross now, cross now, cross now)
We don't condone.
(Flustered little kid)
WAAAAAH!
(Such a delinquent)

[Instrumental break(ing of fine china whilst screeching childishly)]

(Boo)
Smashed dishes.
(Hoo)
Heater is running.
(Boo)
This messed cot,
(Hoo)
You think it's funny?
(Boo)
Toddler plugging the loo...
(Poo)
Oh me!
This livid melee, it just keeps goin'.
(Whee! Whee! Whee! Whee!)
He's raging.
(Me! Me! Me! Me!)
Ripped and moo-dy.
(Restive, flustered little kid.)
Terror keeps goin'. OW!
(Such a delinquent)

R-E-S-T-I-V-E
Child pouts as he screams at me.
R-E-S-T-I-V-E
Day care? The PD?

No!
(Sockets fuming, pockets oozing,
Rockets zooming, f***ing gloomy!)
This kid is restive.
(Soccer-booting, Rocker-hooting,
Boxer-looting, lots of brooding!)
Pure rage.
(Busted brittle bits)
This kid is restive.
(Master Hissy Fit)
Tyke is riled.
(Flustered little kid)
Creeps like lion.
(Such a delinquent)
He's running out of fuel.
(Busted brittle bits)
But tries strained crying.
(Master Hissy Fit)

(Whee! Whee! Whee! Whee!) Terror keeps goin'.
(Re, Re, Re, Restive)
But then I cave in.
(Restive, flustered little kid)
And wipe the house clean.
(Such a delinquent)
I've got to live.
(Just until he splits)
With this terror teen.
(Must get rid of it!)
DKTOS? Who do you think you are...ME?!!

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 LittleLots
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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 13

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   2
 2
 2
 
 5   10
 10
 10
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Guy - September 01, 2004 - Report this comment
This is too funny and quite imaginative. Wonder why no one is paying any attention to it? This one is worth three 5 year olds.
EmiLoca - September 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Freaking YAY, Luke (I should know, as I am a mother of two and can totally relate). Don't you go to an all-boys school? 5's.
M-Dawg - September 01, 2004 - Report this comment
How old was the person? And how old are you Emiloca?
M-Dawg - September 01, 2004 - Report this comment
I thought you just turned 16 emiloca. If that's true then you had kids when you were really young!
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - September 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks Guy. Anonymous '007' has just turned 18, and naturally it was the combined pent-up sexual ferocity of going to same-sex schools that resulted in a most irritating STD. Technically, M-Dawg, she could have had twins at a 'rather' young age. Interestingly, both have flowing long blonde hair and pointy ears........
EmiLoca - September 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Don't worry, M-Dawg, I have neither turned 16 yet or given birth to children. That was me going for some shock-factor humor, except for it must have turned around and poked me in the eye.

On a more serious note, tanty tanty tanty tanty.
EmiLoca - September 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Neither nor. Neither nor. *kills last comment*
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - September 01, 2004 - Report this comment
I've a floor. I've a floor.
Peregrin - September 02, 2004 - Report this comment
I support Guy's comments, JakeLuke... I thought it was pretty good
Adagio - September 03, 2004 - Report this comment
ABC contest.
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - September 04, 2004 - Report this comment
Thank you, come again!
Agrimorfee - September 07, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) Great tune, love how the backing vocals were just as funny as the lead vocal. 555
Johnny D - September 07, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) Nothing to cry about here, Luke!
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - September 07, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks Agrimorfee. Your presence incites weeping everywhere you go, Johnny. ;)
Rick D - September 07, 2004 - Report this comment
I have respect for this one.
Guy - September 08, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC's) Hmmm - looks like considerable more attention has been paid to this since my last comment.
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - September 08, 2004 - Report this comment
Rick- Chortle chortle chortle!
Guy- I know, it's terrible isn't it...
martha - September 11, 2004 - Report this comment
this is truly off the wall!! 5s
Paul Robinson - September 11, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) -Great job, Jake...and you finally picked an 'OS' that an old fogey like me would know! Really Off AND On-The-Wall here! 5's...
neminem - September 12, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) I have nothing to say except good job, and 5'd.
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - September 12, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks martha, Paul (I always keep old fogies in mind) and neminem.
Claude Prez - September 13, 2004 - Report this comment
I confess I had to look up "restive". Well done; my fave line was "flustered little kid".
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - September 13, 2004 - Report this comment
SSH! I confess, I did too!
John Jenkins - September 14, 2004 - Report this comment
Well done, Jake. I really liked all of your substitutes for "sock it to me" except for the "***".
Phil Alexander - September 15, 2004 - Report this comment
I'm so glad none of mine are like that :-) Excellent parody, Luke
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - October 28, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks John Jenkins. I agree, "***" just doesn't really rhyme. Phil- a female actually mated with you?! ;)

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