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Song Parodies -> "Grizzly Bear"

Original Song Title:

"Billionaire"

Original Performer:

Travie McCoy/Bruno Mars

Parody Song Title:

"Grizzly Bear"

Parody Written by:

Ethan Mawyer

The Lyrics

I wrote this about ten years ago, probably before any parodies of this song with the same title. Made some slight tweaks since then.
I wanna be a grizzly bear, why would I not?
Life is simple, eat and sleep and squat
I’d go north for summer, stay warm with my coat
Bears are so good that they are the GOAT

Oh, half the time I’m eating out
I get fresh fish like pike or trout
Delicious berries in my mouth when claws don’t tear
You all better beware
When I’m a grizzly bear

I would be a bear like Yogi
You could call me OG
Optimal Grizzly
Nobody would diss me
When running uphill human beings won’t catch me
And they will not be complaining when I’m a bit gassy
I’ll scowl at any owl with the gall to sass me
Hoo Hoo is not cool, dude
Cryptic sounds are not classy
I’ll swing at pesky moths just from force of habit
Hitting them with rabbit claws minus the rabbit
And it’s no problem if I cannot be employed
It’s all good if my home woods won’t be destroyed
Yeah, that grammar was wrong but you see
When I am a bear you won’t dare bring that up to me

Oh, half the time I’m eating out
I get fresh fish like pike or trout
Delicious berries in my mouth when claws don’t tear
You all better be scared
When I’m a grizzly bear

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

When I’m a grizzly bear

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr

I’d show up and scare the heck out of Goldilocks
So much that she soaks her socks
Then run a little just to get fish crates off loading docks
And go ballistic on some punk kids who are throwing rocks
Without getting sweaty like a bunch of football throwing jocks
I would be like Baloo not King Louie
All my possessions would hardly mean a thing to me
My canine teeth would make it clear I’m no cuddly sort
I’d stay away from men with guns since they might hunt for sport
Another thing is no one would mug me
And not only because I won’t have any money
I know I will not be number two
I am the first guy who will be ursine
I want it more than all of you

I wanna be a grizzly bear, why would I not?
Life is simple, eat and sleep and squat
I’d go north for summer, stay warm with my coat
Bears are so good that they are the GOAT

Oh, half the time I’m eating out
I get fresh fish like pike or trout
Delicious berries in my mouth when claws don’t tear
You all better beware
When I’m a grizzly bear

When I’m a grizzly bear

I wanna be a grizzly bear, why would I not...

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Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 1

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Matthias - August 12, 2020 - Report this comment
Fun parody but the even cooler news is that you published a book! I did not know this! I'll have to check it out and support my Amiright buddy!!!

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