She comes too early when she has a date (I ain't tardy!)
When she's done, she always says it was great

Iiii LOVE to bother any person that I hate
That’s why this bitch is a champ

She doesn't hang with the counts and the dukes

Won't go to Jersey, it makes me puke!
And I definitely won’t hang out with my author, Luke
That’s why the lady is a champ

I love the sweet winter wind in my hair

Life without care!

Oh, I'm so broke, (It's ok'!)
I hate "Terra Nova", it sucks and it's crap
That’s why the lady is a champ (I'm a champ!)

Sometimes I watch John Waters

Oh, that film with Divine

And I love the Monkees

Davy's just fine

I follow Hall & Oates

She sings "A chorus line"
That's why the lady is a champ

I love "Adventure Time"

With Jake and Finn (Yeah, Finn)

And I can stay sober after drinking bottles of gin

She goes to the opera just to join in (Yes, I do!)
That's why this lady is a champ

She likes to kick (kick) ass (ass) with her shoes

There's just no use! But I got no dough (Oh, no?)
And this song is givin' me a cramp!
That's why the lady is a champ, go!

I love the sweet winter wind run through my hair

Life without care! (I'm so hot!)

But I'm so broke (Oh noes!)

Hates "Mike & Molly", it sucks and it's crap
That's why the lady is a champ
That's why the lady is a champ
That's why the lady is a champ!