I'm in the door, an appointment at 4
There's only one opticians in this store
Why all the fuss? It's just a check up!
“I promise I won't be too rough”

“Is it better or worse with it?”
“Can you read the eye chart, too?”

Now I'm going to shine the light in your eye
Try these new prescription lenses that I have found
The way you're reading the lines makes it easy to tell
And I kno-o-ow that you need spectacles!

Can you see the red or green light clearly?
Would you like to come and choose some frames with me?
I will open the book, to see what you can read
'Cos I kno-o-ow that you need spectacles!
I kno-o-ow that you need spectacles!

So try them on
They look all wrong
Just wait until I clip the lenses o-o-on
You've got to try
Look me in the eye
You're colourblind, and it's not a surprise!

“Is it better or worse with it?”
“Can you read the eye chart, too?”

Those glasses lighten your face like no other pair
You need some bifocal lenses to match your hair
The way you're squinting at me makes them easy to sell
So I'll sell you, sell you some spectacles!

You'll find you suddenly see the world more clearly
Please look at this colour chart, and tell me what you see
The lenses that I have picked make you see clearly
And I kno-o-ow that you need spectacles
Now let's order your spectacles

Click click click click click click click, press enter
Click click place your order
Click click click click click click click, press enter
Click click place your order

Do you need hard coating on them or something else?
I'll throw some lens cleaner in to clean them yourself
There's insurance on these (which I need to sell)
There you go-o-o, soon you'll have spectacles!

I'll need a deposit from you, is there anything else?
Now that I'm leaving the shop I'm so overwhelmed
I'm so happy they made a successful sale
Now I kno-o-ow soon I'll have spectacles!

Now I can finally see people looking at me
And I'm not in danger of walking into a tree
Now I'm leaving the shop and I do believe
That I kno-o-ow that I've ordered spectacles
That I've ordered spectacles
Woah-oh-oh, now I've got my spectacles!