You're spurting, Nasty... You've grossed me out
Your nose is running, running
Please wipe your snout
You've made me shout: "Eww!
Disgusting freak!"
Tissues you're shreading, shreading
I've heard you sneeze

I don't wanna be needing these gloves
Since you're the creep that I love
But it's killing me when your nose sprays... So nasty!
See I'm really scared of your germs
So I grabbed a new pair and I squirmed
There's a lotta snot up in your face

Your boogers!
Loud wheeze!
Makes me glum and so I've frowned, Oh geeze!
Watch me sneer... And I've teased
I'm a punk without much sympathy
Yeah, I've heard your nose blowing
And I'm in fright
That I'll catch this sickness from my wife
Your boogers!
Mouth breeze!
Smells like junk due to your damned disease!

(Babe)
Your swollen sinus
Makes me throw up
There's not much banging, banging
Think I'm a chump
I've heard you shout dear
"Bring me a cure!"
Handkerchief you wring, you wring
Is far from pure

I don't wanna be needing these gloves
Since you're the creep that I love
Honker's spilling green when you're in pain... Ooh yucky!
Now I'm here to take care of you hun
Please ignore when I glare at you hun
There's a lotta snot up in your face

Saw boogers
And screamed
Think I'm nuts but I am O.C.D.
Now it's clear
It's extreme
Dressed in scrubs from the infirmary
Yeah, Your nostrils keep gushing
Now I'm scared white
I need perfect cleanness in my life
Watch boogers (Boogers!)
And freeze! (And freeze!)
Sorry babe that I got ornery!

Yeah!
Looks like your face melted
Because your boogers leaked
I know your touch is toxic
But your name is not Brittany
You filled our garbage can
With rags you've thrown away
Cause girl you're snotty like a sweet sixteenth birthday

You're not in the greatest shape
But I know I can't escape
I'm your husband so I won't split
That killer cough's
So dry

Boogers!
You've sneezed! (Sneezed!)
Hate that scum that floats around near me ('round near me!)
Packed my gear (my gear) my mask's squeezed (mask's squeezed)
'Round my head in your vicinity
Mind's hazy (yeah) and your nose is running
This room's air-tight
Think I'll catch this sickness from my wife
Those boogers! (Boogers!)
Launched free! (Launched free!)
In the dumps because your skin's bright green

Boogers!
Oh geeze!
You're a grump because I spilled your tea
Phlegm smears (Phlegm smears) your sleeves (your sleeves)
Filled the tub and showed some empathy
Yeah, My brain keeps on bugging
While I act nice
Think I'll catch this sickness from my wife

Boogers! (Boogers!)
Diseased! (Diseased!)
Damn, This sucks, You passed the flu to me! (Flu to me... Flu to me!)