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Song Parodies -> "DUI (Guy is Screwed)"

Original Song Title:

"G.U.Y. (Girl Under You)"

Original Performer:

Lady Gaga

Parody Song Title:

"DUI (Guy is Screwed)"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

[Spoken Intro]

Speeding double-zeros, pedal to them metal fire, weaving- frightening
Reckless release,
sirens wailing in the background, inebriated disposition

6-packs, oh yeah, I’ve had a few
I’m gonna get a DUI
It‘s sad, intoxication under review
And breathalyzers just don’t lie

In this crash I could have died, pole cleft my hood in two
More than 0.8 in my blood
In my blood

Test me, test me, yeah, I reek
Cuff me, cuff me, Miranda read
Yeah, it’s me the drunken fool that almost died

In that crash almost died (DUI)
In that crash I almost died (DUI)
In that crash I almost died (DUI)
Had more than a few, this time

Now all my words are slurred as I spew, then hurl
No misunderstandin’, drinkin’ ain’t cool
It’s draggin’ me down to hell

In this crash I could have died, pole cleft my hood in two
More than 0.8 in my blood
In my blood

Test me, test me, yeah, I reek
Cuff me, cuff me, Miranda read
Yeah, it’s me the drunken fool that almost died

In that crash almost died (DUI)
In that crash I almost died (DUI)
In that crash I almost died (DUI)
Had more than a few, this time

Tried AA but didn’t stop- it wasn’t worth it
Cuz' I was weak and couldn’t take the truth
More often drunk than not because I’m so into booze
And now I’m really screwed

Test me, test me (These wounds need stitched)
Test me, test me (as the ambulance is on its way)
‘Nother felony (appearing in court judged by a jury of my peers)

Test me, test me, analyze
Charged with another DUI
I won’t be surprised if I’m the guy that you despise

In that crash almost died (DUI)
In that crash I almost died (DUI)
In that crash I almost died (DUI)
Had more than a few, this time
In that crash I almost died (DUI)
Covered in vomit (DUI)
After I throw up (DUI)
Had more than a few this time






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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Patrick - April 08, 2014 - Report this comment
I've been attending a series of classes sponsored by the Kansas City, Kansas Police Department. They had some guys talking about drunk drivers. A municipal judge said that DUI offenders have to take a series of expensive classes before they can get their licenses back. Didn't ask how successful the classes were in stopping these characters from drinking.
Rob Arndt - April 08, 2014 - Report this comment
Don't really know, but after .08 BAC and DUI... under probation falls to .01 BAC. Most DUI crashes are caused by repeat offenders.

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