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Song Parodies -> "Fat-ass"
Original Song Title:
"Judas"
Original Performer:
Lady Gaga
Parody Song Title:
"Fat-ass"
Parody Written by:
Robert D. Arndt Jr.
The Lyrics
Who can forget the 1970s cop turned Private Detective Frank Cannon? He retired from the LAPD after his wife and son were tragically killed in a car crash. As Private Detective, Cannon was a big man with a passion for fine food, pipe-smoking, and his '72 Lincoln Continental Mark IV with the Motorola MTS mobile phone (predated cell phones)! Cannon used his class, charm, cunningness, and wit to solve his cases. Sometimes he got beat up, but most of the time he used karate, judo, and even his abdomen to knock opponents down. He carried a snub-nosed .38. A portly man, Cannon remianed a model citizen and was very kind to everyone.
So, so, so, so
BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass
So, so, so, so
BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass
Fat-ass!
Cannon
Fat-ass!
Cannon
Fat-ass!
Cannon
Fat-ass!
BIG GUT!!!
Private Detective, he’s was heavy
Overweight, pipe-smoking, loved to feed
Drove a Lincoln with a phone- insane
Loved fighting crime, when not at the deli
Brought tough guys down, tough guys down, down
With belly so round, belly so round
[Chorus]
He was just a Portly Fool, who sometimes acted cool
SO BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass, lazy
He was just a Portly Fool, who sometimes acted cool
SO BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass, lazy
So, so, so, so
BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass
So, so, so, so
BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass
Fat-ass!
Cannon
Fat-ass!
Cannon
Fat-ass!
Cannon
Fat-ass!
BIG GUT!!!
For a fat guy he wasn’t so clumsy
Smooth talkin’ amd dinin’ were his ways
Not so bad for a Private D-ck
Snub-nosed .38 was always raised
Brought tough guys down, tough guys down, down
With belly so round, belly so round
He was just a Portly Fool, who sometimes acted cool
SO BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass, lazy
He was just a Portly Fool, who sometimes acted cool
SO BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass, lazy
So, so, so, so
BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass
So, so, so, so
BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass
Fat-ass!
Cannon
Fat-ass!
Cannon
Fat-ass!
Cannon
Fat-ass!
BIG GUT!!!
[Bridge]
In the most practical sense,
Frank Cannon WAS corpulent
Food eater, non-exercising wreck, he used his mind
But in the cultural sense
He always dressed his best
And he never caused offense
Most of the time Cannon was too kind
Victims wanted hug you,
But after a job you always wanted some fine food
Gluttony was an issue,
Overeating was the passion you clung to
Pant size 62!!!
He was just a Portly Fool, who sometimes acted cool
SO BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass, lazy
He was just a Portly Fool, who sometimes acted cool
SO BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass, lazy
So, so, so, so
BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass
So, so, so, so
BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass
Fat-ass!
Cannon
Fat-ass!
Cannon
Fat-ass!
Cannon
Fat-ass!
BIG GUT!!!
BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass
So, so, so, so
BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass
Fat-ass!
Cannon
Fat-ass!
Cannon
Fat-ass!
Cannon
Fat-ass!
BIG GUT!!!
Private Detective, he’s was heavy
Overweight, pipe-smoking, loved to feed
Drove a Lincoln with a phone- insane
Loved fighting crime, when not at the deli
Brought tough guys down, tough guys down, down
With belly so round, belly so round
[Chorus]
He was just a Portly Fool, who sometimes acted cool
SO BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass, lazy
He was just a Portly Fool, who sometimes acted cool
SO BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass, lazy
So, so, so, so
BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass
So, so, so, so
BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass
Fat-ass!
Cannon
Fat-ass!
Cannon
Fat-ass!
Cannon
Fat-ass!
BIG GUT!!!
For a fat guy he wasn’t so clumsy
Smooth talkin’ amd dinin’ were his ways
Not so bad for a Private D-ck
Snub-nosed .38 was always raised
Brought tough guys down, tough guys down, down
With belly so round, belly so round
He was just a Portly Fool, who sometimes acted cool
SO BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass, lazy
He was just a Portly Fool, who sometimes acted cool
SO BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass, lazy
So, so, so, so
BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass
So, so, so, so
BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass
Fat-ass!
Cannon
Fat-ass!
Cannon
Fat-ass!
Cannon
Fat-ass!
BIG GUT!!!
[Bridge]
In the most practical sense,
Frank Cannon WAS corpulent
Food eater, non-exercising wreck, he used his mind
But in the cultural sense
He always dressed his best
And he never caused offense
Most of the time Cannon was too kind
Victims wanted hug you,
But after a job you always wanted some fine food
Gluttony was an issue,
Overeating was the passion you clung to
Pant size 62!!!
He was just a Portly Fool, who sometimes acted cool
SO BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass, lazy
He was just a Portly Fool, who sometimes acted cool
SO BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass, lazy
So, so, so, so
BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass
So, so, so, so
BIG, Cannon was a Fat-ass
Fat-ass!
Cannon
Fat-ass!
Cannon
Fat-ass!
Cannon
Fat-ass!
BIG GUT!!!
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/9/93/William_Conrad_Cannon_1972.JPG/456px-William_Conrad_Cannon_1972.JPG
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