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Song Parodies -> "Cryptoman"
Original Song Title:
"Wunderland"
Original Performer:
Lady Gaga
Parody Song Title:
"Cryptoman"
Parody Written by:
Robert D. Arndt Jr.
The Lyrics
This is number 10 of 12 unreleased Gaga songs that I have chosen to parody. This one is about Daniel Decker, a simple auto mechanic, that loses his 7 year old daughter to a sadistic pedophile murderer. Having lost the will to live, Decker goes out deep in the woods one night with a .45 to kill himself. As he pulls the trigger a strange light from the sky shines down upon him. He finds himself still alive aboard an alien craft. The beings psychically reading him are curious about his motives for self-sacrifice and decide to give him a new life with the power to change into a range of exotic dangerous beasts collected from worlds around the universe. He possesses the power of transmutation and is released to hunt down the murderer of his daughter. Driven by rage his first change is into the ravenous Rakanatir- an alien cat-like beast.
He lost his girl, she was seven
Took his life, saw a light from heaven
Body transmuting- Cryptoman
Got a second chance from aliens
He can't believe, c-c-can't believe, what he can do!
Pedophile murderer he will pursue…
Sudden change
Hideous beast… then back again
He’s the Cryptoman, and he’s after you
So run away
Try to escape if you can
He’s the Cryptoman, and he’s after you
And there’s nothing that you can do
For murderer- no salvation
No mercy, just mutilation (panic, panic, panic, panic)
Body transmuting- Cryptoman
On the hunt, he has a plan
He can't believe, c-c-can't believe, what he can do!
Smells his girl’s blood all over you…
He’s hunting you!
Sudden change
Hideous beast… then back again
He’s the Cryptoman, and he’s after you
So run away
Try to escape if you can
He’s the Cryptoman, and he’s after you
Rakanatir comes into view
Tears open your body!
Claws and teeth are bloody!
Tears open your body!
Claws and teeth are bloody! Beg if you can!
Monster meets monster
Rips out your organs!
Sudden change
Hideous beast… then back again
He’s the Cryptoman, and he’s after you
So run away
Try to escape if you can
He’s the Cryptoman, and he’s after you
Blood and gore all that remains
What's left of a bad man
A stalker of evil,
the dread Cryptoman!
Took his life, saw a light from heaven
Body transmuting- Cryptoman
Got a second chance from aliens
He can't believe, c-c-can't believe, what he can do!
Pedophile murderer he will pursue…
Sudden change
Hideous beast… then back again
He’s the Cryptoman, and he’s after you
So run away
Try to escape if you can
He’s the Cryptoman, and he’s after you
And there’s nothing that you can do
For murderer- no salvation
No mercy, just mutilation (panic, panic, panic, panic)
Body transmuting- Cryptoman
On the hunt, he has a plan
He can't believe, c-c-can't believe, what he can do!
Smells his girl’s blood all over you…
He’s hunting you!
Sudden change
Hideous beast… then back again
He’s the Cryptoman, and he’s after you
So run away
Try to escape if you can
He’s the Cryptoman, and he’s after you
Rakanatir comes into view
Tears open your body!
Claws and teeth are bloody!
Tears open your body!
Claws and teeth are bloody! Beg if you can!
Monster meets monster
Rips out your organs!
Sudden change
Hideous beast… then back again
He’s the Cryptoman, and he’s after you
So run away
Try to escape if you can
He’s the Cryptoman, and he’s after you
Blood and gore all that remains
What's left of a bad man
A stalker of evil,
the dread Cryptoman!
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| 5 | 13 | 13 | 13 |
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