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Song Parodies -> "Hurt Emo"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Hurt Emo"

Parody Written by:

Stuart McArthur

The Lyrics

I write this open letter to shame the bully who keeps hurting my feelings - his insensitive comments are for all to see in quotation marks....(Original song here)

Uno, dos, tres, catorce...

(and er five six seven...)

are down!
It's dark
but I know where you are
just from
your farts
coz they are even strong-
er than
a brontosaurus burp - and you've a mole
that's big-
ger than an anaconda"

Hello, hello!
those things you say all hurt you know
Y'say some things I wish you wouldn't, though
it seems you...
really don't care
how I feeeel..........

"Your thighs
look like
phone poles!"
"Your belly has new rolls
its rolls!"
"your skin's more weathered than
the Dead
Sea Scrolls!"
"Dya know that you can't dance? coz jeez I know"

"YOU've got wobbly knees
n'quite a flabby neck
n'dirty finger nails
and brains like Ben Affleck!"

Please stop this abusing
really not amusing

Hello, hello!
these things you say are hurtful, bro
I said stop calling me Pinocchio
but you...
seem to not care
how I feeeel...

(sniff sniff sniff)
(boo hoo hoo)
(I can't take it...)

"All of this - ugliness that IS yours
I suggest - needs to be hid INdoors"
"10 pounds less - you could be Santa Claus"

I wanna sit and cry
You're SUCH a cruel guy!

Hello, hello!
I'm just a dainty nerd/emo
You spread around I've hammertoe
because you...
seem to not care

I can feel you're not lis-ten-ing tho-o-o-ough...
OR else you'd finally kno-o-o-ow...
how I feeeel...

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 11

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   11

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Matthias - October 03, 2007 - Report this comment
Been there, been called that, got the t-shirt. Good work here Stuart on a song that looks like a real bass turd to parody!!!
Jack Wilson - October 03, 2007 - Report this comment
That was awesome! 5s
alvin - October 03, 2007 - Report this comment
you had me at "brontosauras burp"
John Barry - October 03, 2007 - Report this comment
I was scrolling through and I hit the Scrolls verse, my fave in a great effort.
McKludge - October 03, 2007 - Report this comment
Now why would you want to hurt Emo Phillips? He's a nice guy. 555
Tommy Turtle - October 03, 2007 - Report this comment
DKTOS -- opening sounded like "Wooly Bully". Umm, isn't the "fart" part true? If the pooh fits, etc. 555
AFW - October 03, 2007 - Report this comment
Fine spoof peaking
TJC - October 03, 2007 - Report this comment
Excellent effort, Stu! ...and I hope all these 5's people are voting will begin to assuage those hurt feelings!
Below Average Dave ( - October 03, 2007 - Report this comment
Another classic by Stu McArthur, I too had an emo reference today. . .so it's all relative.
TT - October 03, 2007 - Report this comment
Stuart MacBeth, the BBTL parody that you demanded is about ready to submit tonight, to post Thur 4 Oct (Yank time), probably... the full force of your invective is expected there.... and check under your comment at Matthias' "Witch's Brew" :)
stuart mcarthur - October 03, 2007 - Report this comment
anyone other than you TT, and I would have considered that declaration improbable (I haven't even come up with a good title sub for it in 3 years of trying)
stuart mcarthur - October 04, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks Matty - yes it was a bit nasty

thanks Jack, alvin, JAB and McKludge (no it's "Tickle Me" Emo I was aiming at)

thanks TT, AFW and TJC (slightly assuaged - but I'm still hurt! - don't you forget it!!)

thanks Dave - funny how these things bunch up
TT - October 04, 2007 - Report this comment
Stuart McArthur, it was indeed written in a couple of hours and submitted... with, I thought, a rather good title sub... but it didn't post, presumably for "crossing the line" guideline-wise. (What? A TT parody being too lascivious? Not possible!) I'm going to e-mail ChuckyG and try to find out if it can be modified slightly to conform, without losing the concept completely. If so, probably won't re-submit until Mon or Tue, since Friday is often a low-turnout day and might not be best for "Big 7" parodies. Will let you know the response.
Agrimorfee - November 29, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC4) A weird one from you, Stu...I couldn't quite grasp the emo-ishness of the singer, but some of the insults were quite funny.
Matthias - November 29, 2007 - Report this comment
Same sentiment as above.... Sounds like an actual conversation between a bully and some emo kid. I agree with Aggy on it being weird, and I like weird.
Red Ant - December 08, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC4-H) Having read the parody, I would have thought this one of your earlier works, Stu. I'm a bit surprised the intro Spanish is verbatim from the song, the chorus backing shouts... missing? and the end "yeahs" were begging for something to be done to them. I will say the format and pacing is absolutely perfect, but... well, Aussie emos must be a hell of a lot different than the ones here. Still 555 worthy, but I get the feeling this was rushed a bit. Don't go cutting your wrists over my comment though, or you'll wind up in an Evanescence video. =)
bobpiecheese - December 08, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC4H) Quite witty, paced perfectly (as I know the OS, for once), another Classic for Stu.
Mikey Squirrel - December 11, 2007 - Report this comment
ABC- This one was a little weird, but still very good. Bully for you, Stu.
Guy - December 12, 2007 - Report this comment
ABC(H) What I don't get is why they do the "Uno, dos, tres, catorce" start-up. They are saying 1-2-3-14. Very, how do you say... EMOtional.
littleCupCakes - December 12, 2007 - Report this comment
it is most unwise 'to put hell' on General MacArthur!
Kristof Robertson - December 12, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC4H) Hmmmmm....I don't know why, but this didn't grab me like almost all of your stuff usually does, Stu. Not saying it's not good (you rarely ever do bad), it's just a bit.....obvious? Sorry, dude...5s, but not huge ones

p.s. you're still coming over for Yahtzee and Violet Crumble, right? :-D
Below Average Dave ( - December 12, 2007 - Report this comment
Originality (B) I hate echoing other opinions, especially when they aren't top notch echo's. . .This one was predictable to me; Pacing (A) Can't fault you here, sound and well formatted; Comedy (C) Just didn't move me much, sorry Stu; The X Factor (C) Well, in honesty Stu, I hope that you aren't too angry with me for saying this, but I can't say that I really got this one all that well, kinda lost me a bit, but still a good parody, just a little of your normally high marks

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