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Song Parodies -> "Panophobia"

Original Song Title:

"Animal I Have Become"

Original Performer:

Three Days Grace

Parody Song Title:


Parody Written by:

Abbott Skelding

The Lyrics

Panophobia: The fear of everything.
Everyday is like hell
I don’t dare go outside
I’m just as scared inside
The number eight will give me nightmares
So will the Kiebler Elf

I’m scared to watch TV, too scared to brush my teeth
I’d run from spiders but I am just way too scared to run
Don’t wanna sleep, because clowns will eat me
Somebody help me with this phobia
(This phobia, this phobia)

I am scared of myself (I am scared of myself)
I’m scared of clocks and scared of time (scared of clocks and time)
I fear the ground and heights
Pudding and palm trees fill my nightmares
I can’t control myself

Why can none of you see? Nobody will agree.
Nothing will help me with this phobia I suffer from
You don’t believe, I am afraid of sheep
I’m scared of fingers, pinky, pointer, ring, middle and thumb
I’d like to scream, but it’s just too scary
Somebody help me with this phobia

Raindrops and sunlight give me nightmares
Don’t bring me near a well
Q-tips and iPods give me nightmares
I don’t dare use hair gel

(This phobia, this phobia, this phobia, this phobia, this phobia, this phobia, this phobia)

I get scared easily just from the color green
Nothing will help me with this phobia I suffer from
It does scare me when I must cross the street
Nothing will help me with this phobia I suffer from
You won’t believe- I’m scared of gravity
Nothing will help me with this phobia I suffer from
(This phobia I suffer from)

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 4.9
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 18

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   2
 4   2
 5   14

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Billy Boyd - July 04, 2007 - Report this comment
I have that. Nice parody. 5's.
Kristof Robertson - July 04, 2007 - Report this comment
You poor thing, Abbot. Luckily you're not scared of writing good parodies. DKTOS, so I read this as a poem, and enjoyed it. 555
Jaxson Shickler - December 22, 2007 - Report this comment
It's okay. I've seen better tho. 3's.
Err Again - April 26, 2008 - Report this comment
AWEMG. It's awesome. I left some fives and ran away screaming.
Silver Power - August 31, 2009 - Report this comment
Pretty funny. I gave you 5s. Are you afraid of those?
DJ Blaze - September 06, 2009 - Report this comment
You'd never guess what I was afraid of as a child.... the PBS P-Pals. (WEIRD!) Well, here's a 555 if you don't have a phobia of it.
Timmy1000 - September 10, 2009 - Report this comment
(ABC P) DKTOS, but listened while reading your parody - very nice job of caturing the mood of the OS and matching the words. A lot of very clever things you are scared of - hope this isn't true. Well done.
Agrimorfee - September 11, 2009 - Report this comment
Lists songs aren't always too memorable, I'm afraid to say.
Guy - September 13, 2009 - Report this comment

And here I always thought that Xenophobia was a fear of everything. I've been called a xenophobe in the comment sections of some of my more controversial pieces. But they we wouldn't be so paranoid if everyone were not out to get us. Fine wrte Abbott.
Stuart McArthur - September 15, 2009 - Report this comment
(ABC) wow, since you're scared of everything, it was interesting to speculate on why you chose the few for this parody, like green and 8. Why not purple and 59? But remember, Abbott, the only thing you have to fear is fear itself, oh, and everything else - very funny idea, and great material for parodying - 555
bobpiecheese - September 16, 2009 - Report this comment
(ABC5) I remember panaphobia being mentioned in a Peanuts comic! That aside, great parody here, 555!
Leo Keough - September 16, 2009 - Report this comment
ABC5(P) Great match with the OS and great job of milking the concept for all it was worth!!!...555!!!
Mark Scotti - September 16, 2009 - Report this comment
(ABC) Hope you're not afraid of 555!!!
Melanie Lee - September 18, 2009 - Report this comment
(ABC) Not bad, not bad. Clever idea, produced for me a few smiles, one laugh. 5-4-5 and a therapist!
Below Average Dave - September 19, 2009 - Report this comment
First time hearing TOS, many great laughs from me, this is turning out to be one hell of a round. . .oy vei, from clowns eating you to "I'd run, but I'm too scared to run" . . .and I liked TOS, great energy. . .fun parody
Matthias - September 19, 2009 - Report this comment
I also loved the line, "I'd run, but I'm too scared to run". The idea behind this song was also friggen hilarious!!!
Red Ant - September 19, 2009 - Report this comment
Fits very well to TOS, and pretty funny to boot. A few more synonyms for "scared" would have cut down the repetition of that word, but I ain't gonna dock ya for it. 555

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