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Song Parodies -> "Sporks"

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The Lyrics

And now... A tribute to Sporks!
Silverware makes you swoon?!
Watch me frown using forks at dinner
Waste time grabbing that spoon
Wish they were merged that would be much simpler

Sporks are such a perfect bleeeeeend
If you're starving, They're your frieeeeeend
Sporks are much more than a treeeeend
Sporks are the tools I'll defeeeeend

Airlines have used this kit
Backpackers cooking? These they're needing!
Lightweight since they're so slim
They can't be topped
When it comes to eating
Ordered Chinese take-out
Chopsticks are cheap and leave you with splinters
How will I stuff my snout?
To me, my friend, there's just one answer!

Sporks I'm holding in my haaaaand
When you're hungry they're so graaaaand
Sporks are held in high demaaaaand
Sporks are found in prison-laaaands

Samuel Francis* is the maaaaan!
Can't you tell that I'm a faaaaan?!
Toss your forks out in the traaaaash!
Sporks are all I'll use to gnaaaaash
Sporks I'm buying...

*Samuel Francis is the man who invented the Spork back in 1874

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   4

User Comments

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Peter Andersson - August 06, 2018 - Report this comment
As the resident Viking I have to eat with my bare hands, a big hunting knife and occasionally a nearby rock (to crush the raw bear and/or moose limbs to get to the juicy bone marrow). No sporks for me, but I'm voting 555 cause you're making fun of Russians!
Matthias - August 06, 2018 - Report this comment
Peter - I am? I thought this was a generic spork tribute song... I missed where I was making fun of Russians... Unless the inventor of the spork is a Russian man...
Matthias - August 06, 2018 - Report this comment
I think I get it.... Is t.A.T.u. from Russia? Yes! -checks Wikipedia- I discovered the secret!!
Rob Arndt - August 06, 2018 - Report this comment
555! But it was actually Imperial Germany that put the spork in the German Army mess kit (kochgeschirr) in the late 19th century. Finland then copied them.
bobpiecheese - August 22, 2018 - Report this comment
(Artistry) I'm personally more a proponent of splades (they're like angular sporks you can kinda cut with), but hey, "spork" is an infinitely funnier word. Weird how we both did food-related parodies this round, huh. 555 stabbing implements!

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