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Song Parodies -> "I Gotta Shop (To Stay Alive)"

Original Song Title:

"I've Got To Rock (To Stay Alive)"

Original Performer:

Saxon

Parody Song Title:

"I Gotta Shop (To Stay Alive)"

Parody Written by:

Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd

The Lyrics

First: This parody is based on the video version of the original song that has verses in different order to the album version, possibly due to super duper geriatric guest vocalists Lemmy Kilmister of Motörhead, Angry Anderson of Rose Tattoo and Andi Deris of Halloween being in it and accompanying Saxon's own Biff Byford. The video can currently be found here: http://www.saxon747.com/en/is

Second: According to suggested legislation over here bloggers and home page writers might soon be coerced to verify their credibility when supporting products and things by also having to state if they've gotten paid to do so, and if so by whom and how much - Good luck to the IRS going through eight billion trillions of dynamic web pages looking for violations to that! Not yet compelled but in early and unsolicited concordance I've decided to confess that these new song lyrics on this here page are in reality not written by me but from the marketing department of ParisHiltonLifestyle Inc and that I've received an obscene amount of million dollars to publish it under my good name. (I can only hope that you hardcore parody fans will like it anyway).
I buy new shoes, I buy some gowns
I only stop in red-paint towns
I buy the law, when I make good
I take no stand, I'm understood
Can't stop me now, I offed Nicole
Alone I make the centrefolds

I'm so hot - I believe
And credit cards are all I need
Can't slow down - can't take five
I gotta shop to stay alive - stay alive

I spend it out, it turns me on
I give out moolah all year long
Lewd and screwed, that's me on tape
I never dared to hit escape
Can't stop me now, I've pawned my soul
All year I make the centrefolds

I'm so hot - that I seethe
And credit cards are all I need
Can't slow down - can't take five
I gotta shop to stay alive - stay alive

I need help - to just breathe
Dad's credit cards fulfil my needs
He's at home - can't take five
He's gotta earn, to fix my driiiive!

Let me tell you 'bout my creed
My wallet's got a need for speed
I hear ka-ching and feel upbeat
When I endow I feel complete
Called obtuse and called a ho
But still I make the centrefolds

I'm so hot - that dough leaves
But credit cards are all I need
Can't slow down - can't take five
I gotta shop to stay alive

I have bought - since I teethed
And credit cards are all I need
Can't slow down - can't take five
I gotta shop to stay alive - stay alive

Etc

© Peter Andersson.

Your Vote & Comment Counts

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.4
How Funny: 4.4
Overall Rating: 4.4

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
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 2   1
 1
 1
 
 3   0
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 4   2
 2
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 5   6
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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Jason - May 11, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Don't spend all these 555s at once!
Matthias - May 11, 2008 - Report this comment
I was hoping for a Shopaholic satire here. This isn't bad, but the Paris Hilton lifestyles parodies are getting a bit tired. I did like a few of the lines in this parody however such as, "My wallet's got a need for speed", and "Dad's credit cards fulfil my needs".
Max Power - May 25, 2008 - Report this comment
I'll scam your 555 dollar bill
Agrimorfee - May 28, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) It might have been better to focus on the Shopping all around than to try to fit in Paris. But this RAWKS. Your credit score is still 555.
Phil Alexander - May 28, 2008 - Report this comment
First song I performed as a vocalist was 747 (Strangers in the Night)... old, old memories. Great stuff - loved the intro, too.
Kristof Robertson - May 31, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) great fun, Peter.....I kind of agree with Ag and Matty, in that focussing on PH meant sacrificing some originality. Still, for craftsmanship alone, 555
bobpiecheese - May 31, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Given that Paris is completely out of my field of knowledge, this parody kinda flies over my head.
Guy - May 31, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM-Apr-08) Wish it were closer to payday when I read this. I so wanted to spend about $555 here but my liquid asset is in droplets until the eagle craps next time. Fine job Peter.
Red Ant - May 31, 2008 - Report this comment
"Lewd and screwed, that's me on tape " and "I have bought - since I teethed" were my favorite lines. Well done, Peter.
Below Average Dave - May 31, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Never heard the OS before, pretty cool song choice Peter. My favorite part about this parody was about rhyming. I think it would have been better avoiding the whole Paris Hilton thing, which would have made it a tad funnier, but very well written, and the rhyming was superb.
Mikey Squirrel - May 31, 2008 - Report this comment
SOTM- I have to agree that using Paris Hilton seems a little tired now. And her spending habits just remind me of how poor I am. But still, very good job, Peter.

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