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Song Parodies -> "Amethyst"

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The Lyrics

Amethyst is a semiprecious purple stone, used mostly in jewelry. However, in Ancient Greece, they thought amethyst kept them from getting drunk and they would encrust their cups with it. Amethyst actually translates as "not intoxicated".an, were they off!
Verse 1: Revel with drink from the grape
The nectar of the gods
A stone to tame this thrill
More, will pass my lips agape
My to-ga has draped
With this gem, assure things won't get me stoned
Crusted goblet, protect me
Not one droplet, affects me

Chorus: Protects the one, the Never-Wasted painless
Be gone, the headaches of tomorrow
Blessed the one who's holding amethyst
In he land of the dull plays!

Verse 2: Depart from this ra-ging bash?
But there's still gobs of wine
Beseech all your tongues, do not despair
Do believe all that you hear
You're relieved of wine and beer

Chorus: Effects of wine, be Always-Plastered
Stains of your barf, and fear the coming Apollo
Affects me not, I'm holding amethyst
In the land where we drink late

Chorus: Collect the rocks, the Purple pebbles
Made of pure quarts, they're here to steal or borrow
Select the ones of perfect amethyst
Now wine can't intoxicate

Bridge: Drinking, splurging
For nothing's too much
RUcous noises of the Never-Blatant falling

Chorus: Ingest too much, the Ever-Wasted
Pain of your heart, and tears of shit-faced sorrow
It was a bluff, this useless amethyst
In the land of the Wasted!

Those poor drunk idiots. Please rate and comment if you enjoyed this :) Or you could like me on Facebook or follow me on Twitter. And find my music on Soundcloud or SoundClick while you're at it!

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   9

User Comments

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Matthias - August 11, 2015 - Report this comment
Very educational! I never knew this about this stone and when you said that you were doing a parody about this yesterday I had no idea where you were going to go with this but you did a very good job on this! Well done!
Peter Andersson - August 11, 2015 - Report this comment
First: Excellent job with varying the choruses. Second: Maybe it's just me but as far as educational parodies go this one was probably a little bit more easily accessible because, well, like I said, maybe it's just me but, you know, it's wine, or worms, oh well... Third: The syllable count for the first verse might be correct but the original's last word of each line are quite different from yours - I can see why that was necessary for the overall setup, and obviously it grew on me from there on, but I almost docked a point on pacing, even though in the end I didn't.
Agrimorfee - August 25, 2015 - Report this comment
I like that you inhabited a sort-of "Symphonic Metal" writing style throughout this, it really made this funny and memorable. "Amathyst" Rocks!
Abbott Skelding - August 25, 2015 - Report this comment
Never heard of this folklore either, but it's very interesting! As compared to Grim's educational spoof, this one was a little more approachable and had a few more laugh out loud moments. Overall, very nicely done!
Max Power - August 25, 2015 - Report this comment
They certainly won't do anything to help with hangovers either.
bobpiecheese - August 25, 2015 - Report this comment
(Artistry) Not sure what I can say that hasn't already been said, except maybe that I was expecting a parody about the Steven Universe character, not Ancient Grecian drunkard-prevention techniques. Great parody, 555!

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