Hi and welcome to Tim's cooking show,
here I'm gonna teach you all I know.
Grab your measuring cup real quick,
make sure that your buns don't stick,
just grease up your baking tray,
and we can get underwaaaayyy.

But wait there's moorre.

This pucka tucka's great you'll see,
just take one step closer to the bench and I'm about to bake.
Look here's my favourite recipe,
let's take one step closer to the bench and I'm about to bake.

Just add some chilli to the sauce,
add some wine "Australian of course." (in the voice of the Consuming Passions chef)
Add some baked beans if you please,
then you really cut the cheese.
Stir and groan and stir and strain,
over and over agaaaaiiin!

Here's one we prepared before.

Turn it up a few degrees,
just take one step closer to the bench and I'm about to bake.
Stir in a little grated cheese,
and take one step closer to the bench and I'm about to bake.
The cookee cutter's out of reach,
so take one step closer to the bench and I'm about to bake.
Make sure it doesn't overheat,
just take one step closer to the bench and I'm about...... BAKE!
bake... bake (fading out).

Looks nuthin like the one on TV!
NUTHIN!!! NUTHIN!!! NUTHIN!!!!
Looks nuthin like the one on TV!
NUTHIN!!! NUTHIN!!! NUTHIN!!!!
NU-THIN!! I'm about to BAKE!

You better not use too much grease,
just take one step closer to the bench and I'm about to bake.
Just look at the Two Fat Ladies,
just take one step closer to the bench and I'm about to bake.
Try serving with a side of greens,
and take one step closer to the bench and I'm about to bake.
from Consuming Passions, "bon'e appetite!"
I took one step closer to the bench and I'm about to.....
..... BAKE!!!!!!