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Song Parodies -> "Bill, Put Your Creature Away"

Original Song Title:

"Picture"

Parody Song Title:

"Bill, Put Your Creature Away"

Parody Written by:

Spaff.com

The Lyrics

Old Clinton jokes never die; they just await new Clinton headlines. (And yes, the last two stanzas of the original have been combined to bring the parody to a more radio-friendly length.)
[HE]
Livin' my life as a punchline
Joggin' to McDonalds at lunchtime
I ain't held an office in
Three damn years
Been gettin' rich from lectures and talk shows
Blowin' it on Playboys and nachos
Gettin' misty - with Lewinsky
Souvenirs

I put my creature away
Back in my pants to stay
If I took him out, man the wife would
Go insane
I put my creature away
At least that's what I claim
Thanks to Kenneth Starr, well my dates just
Ain't the same

- oooh -

[SHE]
I called you last night from my book tour
Ya said you're playin' X-Box with Al Gore
But that voice in the back sounds a lot like
Paula Jones
Chargin' 28 bucks though my book's lame
It's pickin' up the tab for my campaign
It's payin' off 't you jumped that
Intern's bones

But put your creature away
It's done enough, I'd say
Of your eight years, people remember
One damn trait
Bill, put your creature away
You better play it straight
Lest ya want a taste of ol' John Wayne
Bobbitt's fate

- oooh -

[SHE]
I saw you yesterday in the tabloids

[HE]
It was their same old grudge against bad boys

[BOTH]
Since we've been gone the White House
Gets no tush

[HE]
I put my creature away

[SHE]
No chance you'll change your ways

[BOTH]
Guess it's time we both admit it

[HE]
I like Bush!

[BOTH]
Yes it's time we both confess it
We like Bush!
Copyright 2003+ Spaff.com

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.1
How Funny: 3.9
Overall Rating: 3.9

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2
 1
 
 2   1
 0
 1
 
 3   2
 0
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 4   1
 2
 3
 
 5   5
 5
 4
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Billy Florio - June 17, 2003 - Report this comment
Great job man....had me laughing the whole time
Jeff Reuben - June 17, 2003 - Report this comment
Gettin misty with Lewinsky...great line! This was very good!
Mike Florio - June 22, 2003 - Report this comment
that was good...
Spaff.com - July 16, 2003 - Report this comment
A belated thanks for the comments, guys. I was dying for Robert Lund to record this will Bill & Hillary voices, but he couldn't get into it because he didn't know the original. Sigh.
AMIRIGHT AWARDS NOMINEE - November 13, 2003 - Report this comment
Best Political Parody
Billy Florio - August 04, 2004 - Report this comment
votes
Paul Robinson - September 23, 2005 - Report this comment
How about this? Get Bill & Hillary to sing this one...not sure whether they should do the video in the same tawdry-looking cheap motel sets as the OS Video...I think the White-House would be a little too "toney" for...wait...WAIT! Bill - from the tawdry motels; "Hill" - from the White House...except I don't think they would let her in now...anyway, good job...this one has been overlooked, it seems...
Spaff.com - September 29, 2005 - Report this comment
P-Rob: I TOTALLY wanted to get a "Bill and Hillary" recording of this. Grape minds think alike. It's dated now, alas, but maybe I'll rewrite and revive it the next time the Clintons are in the tabloids. Which you KNOW will happen. Anyhoo, thanks for checking out my back catalog.
Rex - December 29, 2006 - Report this comment
Pure greatness and a perfect finish. I need to stop looking at your parodies, because I'm almost out of synonyms for "awesome".
Spaff.com - January 06, 2007 - Report this comment
Wow, Rex, I never would have expected you to whip this one out. Thanks.

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