Making fun of music, one song at a time. Since the year 2000.
Check out the two amIright misheard lyrics books including one book devoted to misheard lyrics of the 1980s.
(Toggle Right Side Navigation)

Song Parodies -> "Calories"

Original Song Title:

"Clarity"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

John Mayer

Parody Song Title:

"Calories"

Parody Written by:

Angela & Kelli

The Lyrics

I worry
I weigh three times more than a whale
I worry
I throw my fat around
But this morning
There's a calm I cant explain
I am sleeping, the world is safe again

*Ooh, oOh, oOh, oOOOooh.*

By the time i recognize this moment
This moment will be gone
I have killed the whole town by rolling over
But John still lingers on

Well, all I got's
*Ooh, oOh, oOh, oOOOooh.*


And I will wait to see
If anyone survived this.
And I will wait to see
How they could still live
And I will pay no mind
When they wont, and they wont,
Because they cant. They just cant.
They're not supposed to.

Was there a second of time
I looked around
Did I roll over
And kill the whole damn town?
Was anything enough to kiss the ground
And say I'm alive now.
And all y'all are dead now.

*Ooh, oOh, oOh, oOOOooh.*
*Ooh, oOh, oOh, oOOOooh.*

So much wasted in my life right now
The panty's sacred just right down the hall.
How 'bout you
Oh,

And I will wait to see
If anyone survived, yeah.
And I will wait to see
But bet they wont, bet they wont, bet they wont.

And I will pay no mind
worry about no dead people
And I will waste no time
Gettin' me & John's life together

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

Place Your Vote

 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



In order for your vote to count, you need to hit the 'Place Your Vote' button.
 

Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 2

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   1
 0
 1
 
 5   1
 2
 1
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

No comments yet.

The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.

Link To This Page

The address of this page is: http://www.amiright.com/parody/2000s/johnmayer20.shtml For help, see the examples of how to link to this page.

This is view # 1283