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Song Parodies -> "Squinting in the Dark"

Original Song Title:

"Crawling in the Dark"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Squinting in the Dark"

Parody Written by:

Below Average Dave

The Lyrics

This song is available at My Soundclick. Page like all my others.
I'll procrastinate
and entice my every
fantasy that I've devised
Of why I keep Obsessing.
And I feel like a fool
for Decisions that I make
and how My Life I Can't Retake
While all my clothes are busting.

Why do I adore
Celebrity tidbits.
I've been squinting in the dark
Sitting on my sphincter.
I'm in an uproar
Think this game's been tainted!
Now they're brawling in the park
I won't even bother

Surreal Life is on
Hogan knows Best follows
Fear Factor had hurt my eyes
Let me notate, it's classless
Will reality ever depart my tele?
Still endeavor every week the Next Top Model's story!

Why do I endure.
I can't comprehend it.
I've been watching them embark
Every race gets crueler.
My doctor's unsure
Why my health's descending?
I've been watching after work
Can't afford to sleep no more

So I watch each new show

How much uglier will Betty grow?
Will lunch linger till a commercial?

Cause I'm staring and
I just don't see why I'm glued to thee.
It's just T.V.

What's so great outdoors.
I'm sure broadband has it.
I've been searching the network
Working on my Posture.
I'm a cable whore
My weight's become morbid
I've been squinting in the dark
Sitting on my sphincter
This is my first parody of P3: The Challenge of Parody. . .like all my P2 and P1 parodies it is available at My Soundclick Page, but unlike the others this one and the ones to come are brand new, no longer am I playing catch up. Of course I still have that B.A.D. 24/7 station as well in case you don't know which song you want to hear by me, you can hit random and it will pick one for you.

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The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 23

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   21

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Norman Wanman - January 25, 2007 - Report this comment
All my fives belong to you.
Yoidy - January 25, 2007 - Report this comment
DKTOS, but I've defninitely been there before. 555
Matthias - January 25, 2007 - Report this comment
555 Channels and Nothing To Watch!!! Good thing we have parodies!!!
Below Average Dave - January 25, 2007 - Report this comment
Thank you for your 5s Norman:) Yoidy, ht*tp:// just in case, and thank you:0 Matthias, nice pun:) I told you, took one day off of Lemon Heads, and look at the result.
AFW - January 25, 2007 - Report this comment
Great take on video addictions..
Ethan Mawyer - January 30, 2007 - Report this comment
This was well done...I specially liked the ugly betty couplet. There were some slight pacing problems (I'm very picky about that)
Below Average Dave - January 30, 2007 - Report this comment
If you don't mind, I wonder where on the pacing. . .I say that because I do record the songs so pacing is a must to do that. . .sorry to challenge, don't mean to, it's just I do perform my parodies, so pacing I kinda pride myself on.
tomario - January 31, 2007 - Report this comment
"I'm a cable whore" lol aren't we all ! 555
Agrimorfee - February 01, 2007 - Report this comment
(Ages Comp) Perfectly paced, IMHO. Possibly the first emo couch potato song.
Michael McVey - February 08, 2007 - Report this comment
DEFINITELY a good couch potato spoof!----MM
bobpiecheese - February 09, 2007 - Report this comment
(AGES) Looks like you need to get outside more often. So do I actually...anyways, well done!
Cat - February 10, 2007 - Report this comment
(Ages) Very clever, Dave! I like the way you put an intelligent spin on this, more parodies need the word "sphincter" in it. =P
Jack Wilson - February 12, 2007 - Report this comment
(Ages)Awesome! Loved it
Adagio - February 21, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC) Good job...yeah...I liked you using "sphincter" instead of the usual stuff. : ) 5's
Jason - March 07, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC-S) Very clever B.A.D. 555
Agrimorfee - March 07, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC3) Rerun!
bobpiecheese - March 09, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC3-S) Everybody loves reruns of means you don't have to make up a new witty comment! You can just write 'See above'! Still awesome!
Michael McVey - March 11, 2007 - Report this comment
Another good one about the evils of being a couch potato!---MM
Rick C - March 12, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC) Not bad, cable whore! I don't think I've ever watched any of these shows more than once but, I read the parody twice. :-) 555
Johnny D - March 13, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC) A cleverly cautionary tale of boob-tube addiction.
Stuart McArthur - March 14, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC3S) and when TV becomes extinct in a few years, when it'll be replaced by some all-bells-and-whisltes incarnation of youtube, the problem's only going to get worse Dave - 555
Jeff Reuben - March 14, 2007 - Report this comment
Well done...regarding the pacing, this is where I think the recording really helps out. Even if the pacing is slightly different somewhere in here (I'm not saying it is), you made it work in the recording so that there is nothing flows nicely. Even Weird Al changes the pacing in his parodies, adding/subtracting a syllable here and there. You don't need to match exactly to make a good recording, you just need to make the recording flow.
Jack Wilson - March 14, 2007 - Report this comment
See above
Mikey Squirrel - March 14, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC) DKTOS, but a very lovely parody about the fine art of couch potatoing. And the blurred line between reality and reality TV (which I hate). Good job, Dave.
Pappa Smurf - September 12, 2007 - Report this comment
I can't see.

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