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Song Parodies -> "Worst D*ck Pic I've Ever Sent"

Original Song Title:

"Best Mistake I Never Made"

Original Performer:

Helix

Parody Song Title:

"Worst D*ck Pic I've Ever Sent"

Parody Written by:

Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd

The Lyrics

This one's for the current round of ONE WEEK NOTICE challenge, this time again hosted by yours truly. (You too can be a host and help us save Amiright, or for starters simply join a round for your own fun - details are to be found under "Amiright Events" on the front page).
I was broadsided by myself an' my little man's head
I clicked on "send too all" with attached my new waterbed spread
Cos what was meant for one, my girl to lust, everyone despised
It ain't funny, Google now has my wrinkly privates filed

It was the worst dick pic I've ever sent
My High school class agrees it's bent
They broke the net, it was not civilized
With a snap I could have circum... vent

When a man gets horny he can have brainfarts, as you know
Doing things he shouldn't do and achieve some kind of ballyhoo
But I was punished quick when a thousand chicks sent forward my sad meltdown
Started trending then on Twitter, got known as the #lamesackclown

It's called the worst dick pic in any land
I fumbled "send" with my small hands
Girls scourge the net with retweets of my gland
And I sure deserve the way I'm banned

When the mob found my hideout it turned to my worst weekend
Now I'm living in the wilds with my hand as my one girlfriend
A dox-, tar- an' feathering balls to the walls as the moralists chased me from town
But those small pixels ain't gonna get old, so I conclude I'm not getting paroled

It's the worst dick pic one ever took
It's now in urology books
And #metoo cops wont let it off the hook
I'm straight but I've been labeled crook'd

It was the worst dick pic I ever clunked
I tell you people don't text drunk
I spend my days now an Himalayan munk
And with goats and llamas here I bunk
The worst dick pic I must admit
The worst of all on all the net

© Peter Andersson.

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Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 4

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User Comments

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Matthias - June 08, 2018 - Report this comment
Whatta d*ck! I don’t know how you get these past the censors but I’m glad you’re able to because all of these songs about your dick make me laugh
Peter Andersson - June 08, 2018 - Report this comment
Songs about my d*ck seems to be the only way to add another longstanding member to the OWN club..... :-)

Well, maybe it has been a bit of a recurring theme since I started working for the urology ward - all the doctors and nurses are d*cking around 24/7, so it was inevitable I guess.

I got an offer for a new position at my old ER ward the other day though so I'll drop the ball(s) and be moving back there later this year. Should be more "accidental" Darwin Award Candidate type parodies again after that.

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