I saw... you read that... published 'zine with cartoons
And heard you laugh...
But you're a politician... Not some common dimwit...
Keep it under wraps

These comics are mind frying with dumb toilet humor
They'll turn you into a jerk

But you'll never frown with these strips
They will make you bust a gut with loud laughter
A buttload of Mad Mags have made you roar
They're so nuts and filled you with glee

Each one... is graced with... that Alfred... E. Neuman...
Huge gap in his grin...
Their spoofs... have made... you chuckle
Like "Battyman", "Harry Plodder", "Jaw'd" and "Star Bleech"

Hope you won't choke on your drool, Fellow reader
Since these issues make you dense

Read "King Korn" and "A-Lad-Dim"
Check out "Spy Vs Spy" with their slaughter
There's a ton of Mad Mags across your floor
It's all fluff penned by dummies

Your brain's deplete
From "The Lighter Side"
"Don Martin gags"
Melted your mind
"A Mad Look At..."
And "The Strip Club"
All these toons reek
Throw out that juuuuuuuuunk...

A bunch of clowns made these strips
Since they never grew up they're offenders
There's so many Mad Mags at your bookstore
Should wear gloves while holding these things

If you are found with these strips
Then your career has sunk down the sewer
Voters see your Mad Mags and they'll abhor
You should shove... these into the sea....

Won't seem profound with these strips
You glimpsed "Big Bomb Theory" and "Walking Dud"
And all of these Mad Mags have made you poor
They're so dumb and soon you will be