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Song Parodies -> "Gandalf the White"

Original Song Title:

"The Rake's Song"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Gandalf the White"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

I have Lord of the Rings on the brain right now. Here's a reflection from Gandalf - the slightly less responsible movie version, who's into drinking in libraries and barging in on hobbits in the middle of the night - addressing Aragorn, Gimli and Legolas to the tune of the Decemberists' "The Rake's Song".
As I researched objects of power,
I blew rings and guzzled tankards of beer.
Then an Elven matron caught me,
And she chided, “Sir, you can’t smoke in here,
All right? Books might ignite!”

Though I was irked, I had what I needed:
Confirmation we were facing the worst.
So much to do, a war to prepare for...
But I had to see Frodo off first.
I brought his plight to light
And gave him quite a fright.

“Frodo,” I told him, “Bilbo left a golden trinket.
I can’t rest until it’s finally gone.
Riders from Mordor could come to your door,
So you and Samwise must leave with the dawn.
Your flight starts at first light.”

Then when he left, I went to the wizard
Who I could count on to help with my quest.
Though I suspected that my efforts would be futile,
I had hope when I consulted the best -
The White - he’d set things right.
But White was not too bright.

Saruman locked me on the top of a tower.
Took an eagle to escape from his wrath.
Came back to you, and I led you but tumbled
Toward the Balrog as you ran up the path.
Our fight went on all night.

Then after I won, I left but returned here.
Seems the world was not finished with me.
I know that you think I don’t look like Gandalf;
That’s because the Grey is gone, you see.
So cite delight, not fright.
I’m called Gandalf the White!

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.2
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   4

User Comments

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Tommy Turtle - August 10, 2010 - Report this comment
Bilb, I'm not into LOTR at all, but a lot of folks here are, and I can't believe that this drew not a single vote or comment. So here's a proxy vote for all those who should have, but didn't - it's obvious that a lot of thought and effort went into this.
          (something else that happens, like being Una'd, but not as bad: you work hard, but no one groks. Occupational hazard. ;)
Bilbopooh - August 10, 2010 - Report this comment
Thanks, Tommy! It's definitely nice to get comments! :D It's a little disheartening when I don't get any comments on something, but I figure somebody could always come along and surprise me at some later date - like today! ;)
UnKnownVotrix - August 10, 2010 - Report this comment
GandolFini a la Tony !
Bilbopooh - August 10, 2010 - Report this comment
I reckon that would be another parody altogether! ;)
Old Man Ribber - August 13, 2010 - Report this comment
Sorry I'm late in responding, but I was imprisoned in the Tower of Orthanc in Isengard! Although I DKTOS, I suspect that you have a touch of Tom Bombadil in you. ;D
Bilbopooh - August 13, 2010 - Report this comment
In that case, I'll doff my feathery cap to you as I ride off into the sunset on Fatty Lumpkin... 8-) Hey dol merry dol, glad you're out of Orthanc!

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