I'm so scared that the way that I feel is written all over my face
When I walk into the room, I wish I was in another place
I run the bath, then pull the plug cause there's somethin I have to do
I drop my drawers and hope that the Milk of Magnesia will make me pooh
It's an awful affliction, yeah it really puts a strain on you
I think I need a prescription, oh to help my bowels move
(chorus)
I'm so constipated
And so frustrated
I'm tryin hard to go
But the poop just stays
I'm on the porcelain throne
I could be here for days
Should I just sit or go eat bran cereal
Oh I just gotta go
But my butt is sayin' no
I'm so constipated

Just when I think I'm under control
I think I finally got a grip
Another friend tells me that we're goin' on a real long trip
They pack a lunch of bread and cheese
And all the foods that bind
Oh my god I hear rumbling and it's comin' from my behind
Oh its so confusing, yeah this I must confess
Should I be double dosing?
Oh but then I'd be in a big mess

So now I'm constipated and so frustrated
I'm tryin' hard to go but the poop just stays
Back on the porcelain throne and I'll be here for days
Should I just sit or go eat bran cereal
Oh I just gotta go, but my butt is sayin no
I'm so constipated
I hate it
Cause i've waited for so long just to pooh
Oh give me an enema or two
Should I just sit or go eat bran cereal
Oh I just gotta go but my butt is saying no
I'm so constipated, so constipated
OH I'm constipated