What's wrong with that fat man?
Going through that,
Strange smelling garbage van
As if its strawberry flavoured jam,
Only Attracting him to the rancid ham,
Over town we hate all the nasty tramps,
Always Asking for that odd bit of food we have,
In this large ashtray
Of a big city,
The fat and lard
From KFC,
But if you only have grease from this sick place,
Its where weight watchers need to operate,
You've got to get your weight under decent rates,
Eat healthy and have a salad on your plate
Yeah,
Fatness is what we obliviate,
And that's exactly why we have lanky mates,
You can't have diets that calorate,
Don't eat too much food or salivate,
Take control of your belt and your weight y'all

(Chorus)
Lardass slimming, fatass trying,
Chicken is good but not by frying,
could you just watch what you eat,
Especially of most red meats,
Posh Spice, Posh Spice, Posh spice, help him
Get some health food, canned or jarred,
But hide the main culprit, Cos you'll still ask:
Where is the lard?

(Backing) Lard, Where is the lard?, where is the lard?
Where is the lard, the lard, the lard...



It just aint the same,
MacDonalds Chains
New foods today
but we pass the blame
if beefburgers are wrong, why is eating no longer prolonged,
pizza hut food pongs
clogged up arteries after eating macdonalds buns
with ongoing dieting,
as we just need some
some laxatives
are our rectums really clogged?
so we can act as if
we have just gone for a jog
in this fat little home of ours
you should get some willpower
to stop eating the bacon and
start using wholemeal flour
we respect wholemeal flour,
it gives you fibre power
you eat too much food so you can't shag your lover
the burgers will be hidden,
the sausages too,
if you cant lose some weight,
then you will go too.
Where's the lard yo...
I'm not telling!
Where's the lard yo...
I'm not telling!
Where's the lard yo...

(Chorus)
Lardass slimming, fatass trying,
Chicken is good but not by frying,
could you just watch what you eat,
Especially of most red meats,
Posh Spice, Posh Spice, Posh spice, help him
Get some health food, canned or jarred,
But hide the main culprit, Cos you'll still ask:
Where is the lard?






(Backing) Lard, Where is the lard?, where is the lard?
Where is the lard, the lard, the lard

I feel the mass of food in my belly,
as it increases my farts get more smelly
most of us care about fastfood selection
oily greasy foods give fat men erections
wrong cooking methods shown to us by kebab shops
negative feelings because of bacteria
inflaming your intestines because of some bad beer
ends up with you having nasty diarohea
whatever happened to the biscuits that you had for tea,
why do you just lie in front of the tv?
instead of getting fit you just get more ugly
like a fruitfly, you need to get on your feet,
thats the reason why sometimes you look asunder,
thats the reason why your weight will not go down,
its no wonder why you seem chubbier,
when you run all you do is bounce

(Chorus)
Lardass slimming, fatass trying,
Chicken is good but not by frying,
could you just watch what you eat,
Especially of most red meats,
Posh Spice, Posh Spice, Posh spice, help him
Get some health food, canned or jarred,
But hide the main culprit, Cos you'll still ask:
Where is the lard?

(Backing) Lard, Where is the lard?, where is the lard?
Where is the lard, the lard, the lard