Coz I'm the food critic (Whoa, whoa-oh-oh)
Coz I'm the food critic (Whoa, whoa-oh-oh)

I'm the motherflipping king if at eating chicken wings and wings
If they can't cook, I will come after those teens, those teens
I'm gonna do it to it, you're gonna do it to it
So come on maybe we can find our way to get you through it

I always will eat like alpha, alpha, number one
I'll mix it and I'll bake it and I will chop it when I'm done
I'm gonna do it to it, you're gonna do it to it
So come on maybe we can find our way to get you through it

I'm the alpha, beta, zeta
I'll save me some for later
Don't you dare act like a hater
Coz I'll cook alligators wrong
(Coz I'm the food critic) Coz I'm the food critic
And you know that I ain't that kind

I'm the alpha, beta, zeta
I'll shock you with my tazer
And you'll get cooked by a laser
Coz I'll cook alligators wrong
(Coz I'm the food critic) Coz I'm the food critic
And you know that I ain't that kind

Tell me this food caused disaster, I will not eat this food
Tell me that I will not have to eat sh*tty food
Coz I'm the food critic

Yeah, I'm the food critic

I won't obey you and I won't eat your pet, your pet
Spray me with mace and I'll tear that grin right off your face
I'm gonna do it to it, you're gonna do it to it
So come on maybe we can find our way to get you through it

Annihilate it and go make me a feast and feast
I'll lock it in your pocket and you'll be chewing in broken teeth
I'm gonna do it to it, you're gonna do it to it
So come on maybe we can find our way to get you through it

I'm the alpha, beta, zeta
I'll save me some for later
Don't you dare act like a hater
Coz I'll cook alligators wrong
(Coz I'm the food critic) Coz I'm the food critic
And you know that I ain't that kind

I'm the alpha, beta, zeta
I'll shock you with my tazer
And you'll get cooked by a laser
Coz I'll cook alligators wrong
(Coz I'm the food critic) Coz I'm the food critic
And you know that I ain't that kind

Tell me this food caused disaster, I will not eat this food
Tell me that I will not have to eat sh*tty food
Coz I'm the food critic

Yeah, I'm the food critic

(Coz when you eat it)
Come here and I'll cook you something to be afraid of
(Coz when you eat it)
Come here and I can show you all just what it's made of

(Coz when you eat it)
Come here and I'll cook you something to be afraid of
(Coz when you eat it)
Come here and I can show you all just what it's made of

Tell me this food caused disaster, I will not eat this food
Tell me that I will not have to eat sh*tty food
Coz I'm the food critic!

Tell me this food caused disaster, I will not eat this food
Tell me that I will not have to eat sh*tty food
Coz I'm the food critic

Yeah, I'm the food critic