("Roll another doob!")
("Yeah.")
("Yeah, yeah.")

I was gonna clear the gloom, until I got high;
I was gonna prevent financial doom, but then I got high.
This economy sucks, and I know why:
("Why, man!?")
'Cause I got high,
Because I got high,
Because I got high.

I was gonna leave the past, before I got high;
Was gonna cheat our creditors at last, but I got high.
It's ninteen-twenty-nine now, and I know why:
("Why, man!?")
'Cause I got high,
Because I got high,
Because I got high.

The stock market's hit "abort" because I got high.
Senator Judd Gregg's selling me short; he says that I'm high. ("No he doesn't.")
Can't escape this train wreck; I'll tell you why:
("Why, man!?")
'Cause I'm so high,
Because I'm too high,
I'm really too high.

I told the kids I'd give'em green jobs; I must have been high. ("No, seriously!")
Why'd I make that dumb promise to those yobs? Guess I was high.
Now their parents want me dead; do you know why?
("Why, man!?")
'Cause I get high,
And their kids get high
Because I get high.

Now everybody hates me, dude, because I got high; ("I mean it, man!")
Now this country is completely screwed, since when I got high.
Friends are backing off, and I know why:
("Get away, man!")
'Cause I might die,
Because if I fry,
They don't wanna die!

My wife wants to be a dyke because I get high;
Even God's gone on strike because I get high.
The repo man's at my White House. Can you guess why?
("Why, man!?")
'Cause I got high,
Because now I'm high,
I'm constantly high.

I can't tell my right from wrong because I'm high;
I'm singing this through my thong because I'm high.
If my pacing is too sloppy, you should know why:
("Why, man!?")
'Cause I'm high,
'Cause I'm high,
'Cause I'm high.

("Are you really high, man?")
("He really is high, man!")
("Get jiggy with it!")
[Etc.]