Hey stupid (stop), I'm down here (stop)
Lots of houses that you're droppin' on, don't care (stop, stop, stop)
You're climbin' down (stop) my chimney now (stop)
Did you think that you'd make it back out (out)?

What up, tubs (what?)? What up, dunce (what?)?
What up, tubs (what?)? What up, Santa?
What up, tubs (what?)? What up, dunce (what?)?
What up, tubs (what?)? What up, Santa?

I've got you hostage now, you've been such a hell of a pest
Your PR might be all glow, I know better, won't rest
'Til you say you'll stop haulin' your fat ass down smoked holes, it's wrong
And don't you dare pull your sack out, not what I want
Best believe I'll cut ya, construct ya a blood pool
This isn't funny, stop that "ho, ho" nonsense, you big fool
I'm not surprised you don't knock, I know the classic lines
About watchin' while I'm asleep, knowin' when I rise
Santa can suck on this, bet you only
Expected some kids with cookies and not a grown me
I don't understand it (what?), how can you manage (yeah)
Squeezin' all of those kilos in that tiny passage?
Wonder if that is real fat, you're stashin'
Lockpicks and tiny cam'ras to spy on my ass, you bastard
So let's get this settled, not gonna get gentle
Best wrestle with this mental freak one typo from devil

Tubs (what?)? What up, dunce (what?)?
What up, tubs (what?)? What up, Santa?
What up, tubs (what?)? What up, dunce (what?)?
What up, tubs (what?)? What up, Santa?

You're no great man, you're no great man
You're no great man (that's stupid), gonna take you down

Aimin' at you, I don't have childlike wonder
That Santa looks legit, I was never under
That delusion, so quit your "sorry" blunders
Each December, I knew my folks bought my plunder
Was no secret, they didn't hide who brought less when I acted shite
All the kids around here? The same type
We're not jinglin' bells, so you can stop the moans
That if I kasplat your dome, I'll be mocked, cajoled
Doubtin' that, could crush ya, with my shotgun, bust ya
And my own cam'ras will prove you swung first, you're busted
I can hear the rumbles on my roof, tiles crumble
I took "reindeer hoof damage" insurance, suck it

What up, tubs (what?)? What up, dunce (what?)?
What up, tubs (what?)? What up, Santa?
What up, tubs (what?)? What up, dunce (what?)?
What up, tubs (what?)? What up, Santa?

You're no great man, you're no great man
You're no great man (that's stupid), gonna take you down
You're no great man, you're no great man
You're no great man (that's stupid), don't want you around
You're no great man, you're no great man
You're no great man (that's stupid), just a creepy mound
You're no great man, you're no great man
You're no great man (that's stupid), gonna take you down