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Music Jokes -> Grateful Dead

Jokes about Grateful Dead from the largest music humor site on the web. Check out the index for other performers we have jokes about.

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I included this riddle with a mail-in ticket request for a Dead show at the LA Coliseum (60,000+) and the ticket people must have liked it because I got a pair of front row center seats!
Q: How can you tell if Deadheads have been in your house?
A: They're still there!

- Submitted by: San Diego Lotto Guy

Conan O'Brien told this in one of his monologues: "The Grateful Dead are planning to release an 85-disc anthology of their musical career. The project has been delayed because The Dead haven't decided which song to release."

- Submitted by: Val Balagot

How meany Deadheads does it take to change a lightbulb?
One to actually change it, 2,000 to take pictures of it, and 10,000 to follow it around until it burns out.

- Submitted by: Cat

Jerry comes to his senses right after his death, looks around and sees that he is in the midst of rock music's late great ones: Jimi Hendix, Janis Joplin, Elvis Presley, and many more. He even sees his old friend Pigpen.
So Jerry walks up to him and after their initial greetings says, 'This is fantastic, man! I never thought heaven would be like this, spending all of eternity playing music with all the great ones!'
Pigpen looks up at Jerry and says, 'What? You mean you think you're in heaven?'
Just then, Karen Carpenter appears on stage, takes the microphone, and says, 'Alright now, one more time until you get it right: 'Close to you.''

- Submitted by: LucidLupin

Q - What did Jerry Garcia say when he came out of rehab? A - Man, this music sucks!

- Submitted by: rick

Q: How many Deadheads does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: None. Deadheads screw in sleeping bags.

Q: Why did the Grateful Dead's keyboardists all die? A: Because their organs stopped working.

- Submitted by: Rocky Rhodes

Q: Why does the Grateful Dead have two drummers? A: In case one of them falls asleep.

- Submitted by: strangiato

What do you call a Deadhead that just lost his Girlfriend? Homeless

- Submitted by: Brendan Ward

What do you call parachutists over a Grateful Dead concert?
Acid Rain!

- Submitted by: St. Stephen

Why did the Dead Head cross the road? To dose the chicken. What happened when the Dead Head got acrossed the road? The Dead Head and the chicken both dosed and hitchhiked to the next show. What happened when the Dead Head and the chicken got to the next show? The chicken stole the Dead Head's old lady plus tie-dyes and has been on tour ever since. What is the chicken's new Dead Head name? Cosmic Cluck How many Dead Heads does it take to change a light bulb? None, Deadheads use candles.

- Submitted by: Wayward Bill

What does a dead-head say when they run out of weed? What is this crappy music?

- Submitted by: Conor

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